God Hates the Mets, Puts Beltran on DL, Tries to Kill Jose Reyes

metspitch.jpg Now that Carlos Betran has gone on the disabled list to mend a long-bruised knee-bone -- joining previously injured Mets stars Jose Reyes and Carlos Delgado -- manager Jerry Manuel is taking, as is his wont, a philosophical attitude. "We have to be optimistic that we can stay competitive," he told the Jersey Star-Ledger. "You have to believe somebody's going to catch fire." We're starting to think a prominent Met may literally catch fire, with the shit luck they've been having. Ace Johan Santana is not the pitcher he was at the beginning of the season. And now we learned that God took a shot at Reyes last night, sending a fire truck to rear-end the car Reyes was riding to, ironically enough, the Hospital for Special Surgery to check up on his torn right hamstring. No injuries are reported. Maybe it's time to consider some mid-season acquisitions -- or to propitiate the baseball gods by calling it Shea.

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