Cheek, in Review: 7 Days of Runnin' Scared

It was a short week but a merry one, with or without a vodka infused turkey. Now that Thanksgiving has been properly ruined, thanks to the diabolical War on Thanksgiving, and Black Friday has passed without fatalities, we descend into Xmas, which has apparently been made safe for non-believers. Now get shopping!

Albany got more special sessions of ten minutes or more, but gave no budget relief. Everyone was cracking on Governor Paterson, even Sheldon Silver, so the Gov offered/threatened to cut the budget himself. Our elected legislators declared this Sovietism and split for the holidays. Too bad the Inspector General can't give them the same treatment he's giving the man-cave janitorial bureaucracy. (The Joe Bruno trial provided a sideshow.)

Meanwhile Carolyn McCarthy bent the knee to Kirsten Gillibrand, Rudolph Giuliani stayed on the fence, and Lou Dobbs mulled a run for the Senate.

PETA UK provided welcome celebrity nudes.

The first annual Miss G Train pageant was "a hot mess in the best way possible." Word went around that Apple techs won't fix smokers' Macs. Death cribs were recalled. David Brooks explained the effect of Bruce Springsteen on his life and work.

New York was declared America's 256th Most Dangerous City.

Rightbloggers defended Sarah Palin from the rape fantasies of liberals. They were less quick to rise chivalrously to the defense of Michelle Obama.

In sports, someone sucker-punched Notre Dame quarterback Jimmy Clausen.

Adam Lambert dirtied up the American Music Awards; we encouraged him to take it to the next level.

Steven Thrasher talked to a signatory to the Manhattan Declaration, especially the anti-gay-marriage part.

Dominic Carter went down. Roland Burris was merely admonished. The Taconic drunk-drive mom's sobriety received a McDonald's defense. Cops shot a kid outside Bayswater Park. A hotel cleaner brought his mistress home to meet his (recently murdered) wife and son. A kid rode the subways for 11 days.

Studies in Crap reviewed 33 Years of Holiday on Ice (souvenir programs)! Includes greatest Studies in Crap pic ever!

Citizens who wished to hang onto their homes and businesses at Atlantic Yards and Willets Point suffered reversals in court. (Neil deMause and Elizabeth Dwoskin post-mortemed the AY case.) Andrew Cuomo declared the UHO jugs for the homeless campaign a fraud.

A guy went crazy on the D train, slashed a man to death, then got locked in the car with several terrified riders before police sorted things out. The 15-year-old who was shot in the head is doing much better. Artists continued to suffer. Bedbugs kept biting. The Cortlandt Street R and W stop reopened, northbound only.

Enjoy the leftovers and see you on the other side.