EXCLUSIVE: 6 Hot Excerpts from Sarah Palin's Going Rogue!
1. On accepting the Vice-Presidential nomination:
I was sitting next to the stove, patching up little Gopher's North Face jacket, when I got the call, and I figured, gosh-a-mighty, why not? Well, they scoot me down to Dayton -- and let me tell you, that place could use a new coat of paint -- and they tell me I have to talk to this crowd, but I say, "Oh, no -- there'll be big-town reporters there, and they'll twist and turn my words so I look like an idjit," but ol' John, he says, don't worry, they're gonna love you, and then he goes into a room in the back of the place they have there and starts beating on the walls and yelling in a foreign language. So I went out there and sure enough, people were cheering and waving flags like I was Clay Aiken, even before I said a word. They kept on cheering when I commenced to speak, but I don't know what-all I said, because I kept looking over and seeing ol' John picking at his hands, probably to soothe the cuts he got on his knuckles pounding on that wall.
If I wasn't so gosh-darned busy raising all my kids, I would have paid better attention to all that entrepreneural jazz. But you mothers know how that goes: you buy a car wash, and then little Plug has a loose tooth and little Geezer lost his mittens and before you know it, guess what -- the darned cars aren't getting washed, and you have to sell the thing off for a profit! And there was Todd so busy building our house out of sticks he found while he was snowmobiling, I couldn't go off playing with businesses. So I said, "Doggone-it, I'm gonna stay right here, mend socks, wipe noses, and such like." But then one day I was clipping coupons for Sunny D and I saw the ad in the paper that said they were looking for a new Mayor for Wasilla, and I guess I just got a wild hair in me.