Holiday Travel Twitter Tales
When New Yorkers travel beyond the local transit system -- which, during this festive holiday season, generally means to the airport -- we suddenly devolve into a world-weary Scrooges, darting through terminals and over tourists. Luckily Twitter, our ultimate venting venue, gives us beleaguered travelers a way to release our deficiency of holiday spirit on the rest of the Twitterverse. 
We have culled a batch of Twitter tales made at and about the home of the Delta Terminal Riot of '09 and lost baggage/mechanical errors/no-Dunkin- Donuts zone: Our beloved JFK.
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And by then we'll likely have a mandatory cavity search for every passenger, or at least a no underpants policy.
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Carrier pigeon sneaks past JFK security with explosives, more than 3 oz. of shampoo.
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You know the deal. Just find a luggage cart return and save up your quarters for Wolfgang Puck Express. You'll be fine.
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Ah, racial profiling as airport pass time. Ken really is awesome.
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Going "phishing"? Does that mean you're high? #spellingerrors #stonerlingo
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Rejoice, they could be playing Bob Dylan.
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Airport security will likely be called to quell angry, un-caffeinated crowds.
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Extra bags will be transferred by resident carrier pigeons in JFK baggage claim.
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A house cat carrying Danny Devito, glass or no glass, probably equals trouble. #AmericaFail
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JFK sees rise in creepy old man flyers after new security measures are put into effect.



























