We See Invictus, The Lovely Bones, and A Single Man So You Don't Have To
Have you heard? It's Oscar Season! That couple of weeks at the end of the year when the studios put away all their horror and Gerard Butler films and instead release The Good Movies.
Is there an Oscar at the bottom of that scrum? Oh no, there isn't.
And one after another, the good movies this year have sucked.
Just to clarify: All the films you've been excited to see are actually very, very bad, according to none other than Us. So far, our esteemed critics have panned The Road, Up in the Air, and even that poor, defenseless Where the Wild Things Are.
We know what you're thinking: "Don't you guys like anything?" OF COURSE WE DON'T.***
And this week's new releases are no exception...
...with Ella Taylor calling Clint Eastwood's end-o-apartheid drama Invictus "borderline daft," Scott Foundas preferring the subtlety of porn to Tom Ford's A Single Man, and J. Hoberman describing Peter "LOTR" Jackson's adaptation of The Lovely Bones with such adjectives as "cloying," "distended," and "ridiculous."
Good thing The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences is expanding its best picture Oscar category from five nominated films to ten. Those people never miss.
***This is just our tough critic façade. We actually do like some stuff. Next week's issue, when we publish the results of our Annual Critics' Film Poll, will celebrate the best films of the year, and even the decade, of which there are plenty.