Why This Decade Sucked, Reasons #6-#3: Clothes, Yankees, Mets, Racism
6. Fashion: We stopped trying, outsourced our clothing trends to stars. 50's: Pegged pants, poodle skirts. 70s: Elephant bells, blow-dried hair. You can easily spot other decades by their fashions. They weren't always pretty, but they showed people were at least trying.
So how will costume designers recreate the '00s? By dressing actors in styles from other decades -- because that's what we did: now hippie, now grungey, now neo-wave, now Flashdance: We seemed to grab everything off other eras' racks. Our signature innovations: the butt crack and the trucker cap. And the snuggie.
5. The Yankees. We thought we were rid of them at last. The Diamondbacks throwing Schilling and Johnson (in relief) at them in Game 7 2001 was like the H-Bomb at Hiroshima; we expected no championships would ever grow in Yankee Stadium again. When the Red Sox stunned them with four straight wins to come back from 0-3 in the 2004 ALCS, and went on to reverse the curse of the Babe, it seemed like destiny.
4. The Mets. That they even got to the 2000 Series was miraculous, so we figured more miraculous things were in store. And they were! Who knew they could choke so catastrophically in the stretch two seasons in a row? Who knew they could acquire so much great talent and produce zero championships? Even God seems to hate them now. Plus they have a boondoggle stadium, too -- named after a bailed-out bank. Fuckers.