Astroland Dead, Did Not Fall at Hands of The Warriors

Everyone who claims to have legitimately enjoyed Coney Island's Astroland while nervously worrying for their safety on rides which were eventually going to off someone can now relax, they no longer have to pretend to enjoy it for its kitch New York Value. It's dead. Supposedly.

Again, via the New York Post, on the matter of former Astroland operator Carol Albert:

The Cyclone's longtime operator isn't all smiles. She told the Post that it's beginning to finally hit her that she'll never be able to resurrect Astroland Park -- which once stood where Luna Park will soon operate -- along another part the fabled boardwalk as she had hoped. "It seems unlikely," she said.

That said, the Cyclone is going to live, a bunch of new fancy Italian-designed rides are opening, and Brooklyn borough president Marty Markowitz is going to do something ridiculous this summer to celebrate, like crack a bottled egg cream on the rickety deathmachine. No, really:

The Cyclone is set to roll in the 2010 season March 28 during a gala event highlighted by Brooklyn Borough President Marty Markowitz cracking a bottle of egg cream on the 83-year-old ride.

Coney Island will continue to remain creepy and dislodge serious emotional fragilities despite how you continue to tell people you actually feel about it.

[fkamer@villagevoice.com]