The One in Which We Get Our Limerick on, Runnin' Scared-Style
May brings all sorts of exciting holidays: It's Masturbation month (obviously), and there's Cinco de Mayo and Memorial Day (of course), plus it's American Pacific Heritage month and Asparagus month, among other things.
Lear: the man, the legend.
Today, for instance, is Limerick Day.
Why is there a Limerick Day? Well, because Edward Lear was like the Elvis of Limericks, and it's his birthday today. Among his beautifully bizarre creations:
There was an Old Man of Thermopylae,
Who never did anything properly;
But they said, 'If you choose
To boil Eggs in your Shoes,
You shall never remain in Thermopylae.'
Personally, we enjoy a limerick, mostly because it's a good way to tell a dirty joke around Grandma without getting yourself slapped.
And so, today we (apologetically) honor the tradition of Mr. Lear:
A suspicious package once sat in Times Square
And nobody knew it was there
Until Shahzad's bomb fail
Set off a strong gale
Yo, see something, say something, mon frere!
Or maybe ...
There once was a blogger named Foster
Who came from nowhere near Gloucester
But then this itsy penis joke
Made Jimmy Dolan choke
And pull all his ads from our roster.