Another Day, Another Tiger Woods Mistress (This Time With Child)

Some days we almost feel a little bit sorry for Tiger Woods. Almost. Like when we hear that yet another mistress (a dime a dozen, these) has come forward and blah, blah, blah. But this time the story has a twist! "Adult film actress" Devon James has announced that he is the father of her 9-year-old son. As proof, the kid's name is Austin T. James. T! For Tiger! Get it? (Or Timothy Geithner, or Donald Trump, or Teddy Ruxpin, but we digress.)

As further proof, the erstwhile lovers met when James was but a nubile 19 "attending a Christian school program." Ah yes. We can see it all now.

Though Ms. James has never had a DNA test or anything, Tiger was the only African-American man she dated at the time, she says, so this is obviously his kid.

After that first meeting/impregnation back during her Christian school days, the two fell out of touch, and she had his alleged baby. But they reconnected when a friend invited her to join in on a threesome with him. And they say romance is dead.

Per the New York Daily News,

"She showed him pictures of Austin, and told him he was his son," the source said yesterday. "He didn't want to meet the boy, but he did send her gifts for the child."

Since James' own mother (who has custody of Austin) calls her daughter a pathological liar, we're going to take this one with a grain of salt.

Meanwhile, per TMZ, other Tiger Woods mistress Joslyn James has accused Devon James of stealing her shit -- cash, jewelry, and a cell phone -- on the set of a Tiger-themed porno movie recently. But maybe Devon just believes in sharing. They do have the same last name, after all.

Tiger Woods Mistress Watch: 15 and counting.