Study: 31-Year-Old Women Are the Most Beautiful Women of All

Ladies, if you're going to start lying about your age, choose 31. (Funny, that's our age exactly!) QVC -- yes, TV shopping channel QVC, as in, target age demographic definitely over 30 QVC -- polled more than 2,000 British men and women for their thoughts on beauty, and found that women in their late 20s and early 30s were considered the most gorgeous of all, way more gorgeous than those fetuses in their teens and twenties.

Looks, per se -- like rosy, unsagging cheeks and skin unwrinkled by years of broken-hearted toil -- turned out to actually be less appealing than the magic c-word, confidence. And as we all know, confidence really starts accruing once you hit your 30s, right around the time your biological clock gets going and you embrace unfound sexual freedom in response to its incessant ticking (see: Cougars are a scientific phenomenon, or "diminished fertility=heightened sexuality").

Technically, it should follow that the older you get, the more beautiful (and sexy!) you become, even if QVC didn't say that, exactly.

In London, 37 percent of women described themselves as beautiful, while only 28 percent of Welsh women did. As for New York women, who have confidence in the boatloads, we'll let this guy have the final word:

Happy birthday, everyone!