Wedding Ideas Are Becoming Progressively More Terrible
In the ever-competitive and super-demanding world of planning one's wedding, the ante just keeps getting upped. Except somewhere along the way, things got kinda confused. Instead of elegant, lovely affairs with sumptuous food and fine wines, we've got the shark-tank wedding, the tar-ball beach wedding, and now...the sleep-away camp wedding.
It's as if, in seeking creative distance from the boring old traditional church-and-reception-in-a-nice-hotel sort of thing, people got kinda...insane. Which wouldn't be unheard of; have you ever planned a wedding?
Anyway, this sleep-away camp wedding thing chafes me like a poorly made lanyard, not only because my various experiences at sleep-away camp involved making out with other horny young campers and engaging in rousing fireside sing-alongs with religious themes ("Onward Christian soldiers!"), but also because it's trying so hard not to try.
The lovely couples upon whom the Wall Street Journal based their latest wedding trend story were, apparently, possessed by the desire to do something "new" that plagues so many a newlywed to be, and decided: What-the-hey, let's rent out a camp, honey, and stash our guests in bunkbeds for the night, and have a rip-roarin' good time!
Instead of bridesmaids and groomsmen, there will be "head counselors" when Serena Orgel, 35, and Josh Young, 36, get married this September at Lake Bryn Mawr Camp in Honesdale, Pa. During the weekend festivities, guests will sing songs in a talent show and roast marshmallows at a bonfire. The newlyweds plan to paddle away in a canoe with a "Just Married" sign. Guest attire? "Camp chic," says the bride-to-be.
Right. And at the wedding of Sarah Regensdorf and Justin Greenbaum,
Their 130 guests were picked up at the airport in yellow camp buses, called to meals by a bell, slept in cabins, did Mad Libs, and divided into teams for color war. On the wedding day, adults signed up for activities like horseback riding. One man got stuck on the zip-line.
This whole thing is great for camps, which can charge as much as $30,000 to $50,000 for an event, and apparently need the revenue, but seems not the deal you'd expect for a mosquito-riddled weekend where you have to wear shower shoes to the outdoor communal bathroom facilities and wake up at 7:30 a.m. for flag salute before enduring unbecoming punishments in a helmet and harness.
Okay, seriously, you unmarried couple friends, not to quash your creativity and amazing individual style, but can you just get married at a nice church or hotel like a normal person? I'll even buy something from your registry, if you insist.