Rightbloggers Stick It to the Man With Groovy Rightwing Revolution
We're talking about the new revolution, man. In this one, the Tea Party people rouse the populace to revolt against "America's Ruling Class" -- which includes both parties but mostly means the Democrats and their Kenyan pretender Obama.
The latest Spurt of '76 began with a shot heard 'round the world -- a hallucinogenic rant at Investor's Business Daily called "Will Washington's Failures Lead To Second American Revolution?"
Its authors, Ernest S. Christian and Gary A. Robbins, labored in pre-revolutionary times for the Treasury Department under Republican Presidents, then wrote for rightwing thinktanks like the Heritage Foundation and papers like the Wall Street Journal. Their rhetoric in those days was partisan in the ordinary manner ("'There he goes again, folks,' Ronald Reagan might say, shaking his head ruefully, as Barack Obama goes charging off on that same spavined old big-spending government horse...").
It may be that Christian and Robbins tired of recycling such cliches, and saw opportunity in the exciting retro-Revo style of the New New Right: Tea Partiers are marching around in tricorners and knee-breeches; Glenn Beck exhorts his listeners to read the Constitution and guides them to right-wing interpretations.
This has led to a wave of conservative interest in the Constitution -- often expressed in drives to repeal its Amendments, which they seem to think spoil the crinkly-parchment gift-shop appeal of the original.
Take the 17th Amendment, which provides for direct election of Senators by voters instead of appointment by state legislatures. If it seems odd that conservatives would want to take rights away from the citizens, consider that the 17th, as Thomas Brewton put it at Men's News Daily, was "one of many initiatives championed by liberal-progressives" in the early 20th Century, back when commies agitated to let everyone vote on any damn thing, leading to the rise of "special interest groups such as public employees labor unions or 'green' fanatics." (Also the 17th was "a key piece in the push to neuter states' rights." And didn't we fight a war over that?)
Also, repeal "would give state legislatures direct influence over the selection of federal judges," says Red County's John MacMullin. How great will it be when the Nebraska statehouse sends Senator Prolife McTaxcut straight to Washington, rather than having an election in which sheeple voters might judge him crazy -- as has sometimes seemed a danger to Rand Paul's Senatorial campaign -- where he can block liberal judges till the cows come home?
Other conservatives have suggested fixing the 14th Amendment so it doesn't let just any old Mexican make her babies American. And you may have seen that the Iowa GOP wants to replace the current 13th Amendment with the original director's-cut 13th Amendment, which supposedly has language that will allow them to strip Obama of his citizenship for accepting the Nobel Peace Prize.
In this era of deep seriousness on Constitutional issues, Christian and Robbins may have felt that the time was right for fightin' in the streets -- or at least alluding heavily to it, and thus stirring their constituents' inner Minuteman.
"The Internet," they began, "is a large-scale version of the 'Committees of Correspondence' that led to the first American Revolution -- and with Washington's failings now so obvious and awful, it may lead to another."
If you can accept the idea that people like Sarah Palin and Jonah Goldberg are the modern equivalent of Sam Adams and Patrick Henry, you may also accept Christian's and Robbins' argument that, even if Congress goes Republican, a "wounded rampaging" Obama may, by "executive orders, regulations and Obama-made fiats," thwart the will of the People, and even steal the 2012 Presidential election. The authors cleverly avoided prescribing a remedy for this anticipated tyranny, but it clearly involves muskets, fifes and drums.
Like Paul Revere's Midnight Ride,the notion of groovy revolution galloped across the internet. Rightbloggers were generally warm to the idea of at least an imaginary Bunker Hill. Some were more hilariously serious than others.