Study: Ovulating Ladies, Possessed by Their Demon Hormones, Must Be Sexy
Well, isn't this interesting? According to new research at the University of Minnesota's Carlson School of Management, women who are ovulating "unconsciously choose clothes and other items that enhance their appearance." They don't do this to snag men, per se, but because of some ancient biological cutthroatedness that makes them want to stomp (sexily) on the other ladies around them. If a scientist says it, it must be true!
The "sexy romper": Perfect for ovulating!
"In order to entice a desirable mate, a woman needs to assess the attractiveness of other women in her local environment to determine how eye-catching she needs to be to snare a good man," says Kristina Durante, co-author of the study.
Said research was conducted by showing ovulating women pictures of "attractive local women" and asking them to choose clothes and accessories to purchase. Think that's weird? It gets weirder. Most of the women in that group chose sexier products than those who had been shown photographs of unattractive local women or women who lived more than 1,000 miles away.
"Women who weren't ovulating didn't respond in kind." (i.e., weren't insane?)
Study did not take into consideration, apparently, that it's way more fun to fake-shop for slutty clothing that you'll never actually buy than it is to virtually select a pair of khakis or a practical button-down with slimming pinstripes.
Still, this may have important practical implications for marketers! Ready the focus groups, quick! Ovulating ladies may be the new tween demographic, or something. I mean, if Forever 21 is any indication.
Meanwhile, we'll stick to wearing those same old baggy gym shorts and sweat-stained tees, cause you know what? That way we won't scare off all those dudes who think we're "ovulating" based on our tube top and hot pants. Smarts, here.