We Rank the New Cigarette Warning Labels: The Good, the Bad, and the *NSYNC

​The FDA has released a bunch of new warning labels to be prominently displayed on all cigarette packs sold in the United States by June 2011. The 36 large, full-color ads (9 of which will end up on packs) are all meant to deter the buyer from smoking. Clearly. But which work the best? And which are simply ridiculous? Don't worry, we'll tell you!

We analyzed the ads based on three factors to arrive at an overall school-letter grade: Fear (speaks for itself), D.A.R.E. (whether or not we saw it in our 4th grade D.A.R.E. class) and Stop (will it stop smokers from smoking? Probably not).

Fear Factor: There's no real fear here -- unless you're afraid of getting wet, of course. Some of us are.
D.A.R.E. Factor: D.A.R.E. never really showed us common annoyances smokers face, like not being able to smoke in bars or having to withstand the cold while on your ciggy break. So this is new!
Stop Factor: Why stop, when you can keep smoking? This image show you how to do it with grace, confidence, and a simple newspaper.
Overall Grade: D-

Fear Factor: Puppets are scary. But these are really marionettes. Is that scarier? There's also something vaguely Hitchcockian about this. Did he smoke?
D.A.R.E. Factor: "Cigarettes control you" has "upwardly mobile D.A.R.E. officer" written all over it.
Stop Factor: This *NSYNC ripoff won't change your mind about smoking, but it will get "Bye, Bye, Bye" stuck in your head. Sorry.
Overall Grade: F

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