Rightbloggers Celebrate Reagan's 100th Birthday; Attack His Son, Ron Jr.; Cheer His Daughter, Sarah Palin
"I can't imagine the Washington Post running an article on five myths about Bill Clinton or Jimmy Carter," snarled This Ain't Hell, "yet on Reagan's 100th birthday, they have the gall to run an article entitled 'Five myths about Ronald Reagan's legacy.'" This Ain't Hell answered the Post's gall with enraged non-sequiturs. For example, when the Post's Will Bunch noted that Reagan's aggregate poll number was not so amazing, TAH recalled that when Reagan's body lay in state at the Capitol, "The Metro ridership record was shattered that day -- the record it shattered was Bill Clinton's inauguration." Live Reagan may have drawn a mere 52.8 percent approval rating, but people really loved Dead Reagan, and that's what counts! (Also among TAH's laugh lines: "If we had gone to Desert Storm with Jimmy Carter's army, we'd have won, but just barely.")
And when someone pointed out that Osama bin Laden was among the Afghan rebels Reagan supported in the 1980s, hoo boy: "Lefty Douchebags: Reagan Created the Taliban or Something," said JammieWearingFool. "So I guess we should all hate Reagan now... This is how the left celebrates Reagan's birthday. By distorting history to try and get Republicans to suddenly hate the guy." And after JammieWearingFool had been so nice to them!
JWF added, "I can't wait for some celebration of Bill Clinton where Think Progress details how he let bin Laden get away time after time leading up to 9/11" -- though we can't guess why Think Progress would pick this theme up, as the conservative press has been on that story for nine years.
Every rightblogger had his or her flower to lay at Reagan's bier -- but for Reagan's own son, Ronald Jr., they had only homophobic wrath. Reagan Jr.'s thoughts on the subject of his father don't always conform with conservative gospel -- for instance, he thinks his dad didn't really have much in common with Sarah Palin. And where does this guy get off telling rightbloggers what Reagan was really like?
"Little Ronnie Gets His Tutu in a Wad Over Sarah Palin," guffawed HolyCoast. Left Coast Ledger showed a picture of Reagan fils practicing ballet and asserted, "Ron Jr. disgraced his father by hanging out in teen gay bars like Hollywood's Odyssey 1, probably doing dope with the locals," etc.
"Ron Reagan jr: I'm a Pitiful, Disgusting Little Boy," said Pundit Pawn. "Is this man sick or what?" growled Bungalow Bill. "Shouldn't he be proud so many people love and admire his father?"
Argh! Lookit him, dancin' on his toes!
If you're confused that Bungalow Bill would equate support for Sarah Palin with filial devotion to Ronald Reagan, be aware that Palin did her utmost last weekend to cement that impression, bringing her spotlight-grabbing skills to a big Republican 100th birthday party for the Gipper. Several conservative outlets jumped on it, some just making goo-goo eyes at the self-defenestrated Governor, others yelling some more at Ronald Reagan Jr.
An apotheosis was achieved by Andrew Coffin at Andrew Breitbart's Big Journalism, who offered a kind of Daily Double of conservative persecution mania by complaining, "New York Times Commemorates Reagan Centennial by Misrepresenting Palin at Celebration." Not one, but two rightwing icons suffering Christ-like at the hands of the Lieberal Media!
The Times, Coffin said, had wronged Palin by concentrating on her brief speech at the event and disappearance shortly thereafter. That, said Coffin, was "simply not accurate"; Palin had also walked around the ranch with her family and a friendly photographer. She got on a horse and, "confident in the saddle... road the very same trails the President loved..." Also, at one point "she walked a few feet away from the rest of the group to take in more of this dramatic California Central Coast vista, and, I think, to reflect on the experiences she had at the Ranch that day."
Normal people might imagine these activities were actually for publicity purposes -- indeed, Coffin reproduced handsome photos thereof. But Coffin claimed Palin had only "reluctantly agreed" to the pictures, which proved "that Governor Palin is a leader cut from the same cloth [as Reagan]"; if you needed a further explanation, he added, "it is these great western ideals, and the way they could be seen at the Ranch in small but telling details, that she viscerally connected with."
And so Reagan 100 Day passed into history, but his holy name will be invoked wherever Republican Presidential candidates gather, and complaints that ungrateful sons and other traitors didn't show him enough respect will not perish from the earth. For instance, Pajamas Media told us about "liberal Washingtonians" many of whom "refuse to call the D.C. airport by its real name, Reagan National Airport. Instead, they like to call it by its old shortened name, 'National Airport.'" Patriots, you know what to do! Haunt that Cinnabon and tell those bastards, "It's Reagan Airport, dammit!"