Howard Stern Questions A Former Scientology Private Eye

Categories: Scientology

MarkChaupetta.jpg
Chaupetta, left, with male and female employees he uses to tempt targets into cheating. (What a guy!)
While we wait for reports on tonight's drama in Beverly Hills -- where Tom Cruise will be receiving a Humanitarian Award from the Simon Wiesenthal Center for all his years hunting down disembodied space aliens through the magic of Dianetics -- there was a fun morsel for Scientology watchers this week right here in New York City.

On Tuesday, Howard Stern had on his show a private investigator, Mark Chaupetta, who does your run-of-the-mill stuff with cheating husbands and wives (Zzzzz). But the show picked up when Chaupetta began discussing his past as a PI working for Scientology.

As we reported just last week, high-profile defectors of Scientology are pretty used to being surveilled, which can include having their trash inspected. And so it was fun to hear Chaupetta confirm that Scientology pays flatfoots to do that kind of work.

The helpful folks over at Operation Clambake provided a transcript of that portion of the show:

Howard Stern: You were hired by the Church of Scientology, right?

Mark Chaupetta: I was...

Stern: Why?

Chaupetta: In my...there's a chapter in the book... I met them about 10-12 years ago and they hire me just to do background work, to do investigative work on...

Stern: In other words, if I am a person who criticizes the Church of Scientology...

Chaupetta: They would hire someone like me to find everything you could think of about you, surveillance, pull trash...

Stern: Why are they so paranoid? They have a successful operation...

Chaupetta: You know, it's weird I...

Robin Quivers: Who are they looking for?

Chaupetta: You know, it's weird, a lot of them are ex-members and I can't say anything bad about them because they've never handed me pamphlets, they've never forced me to go in that direction. I was an outside contractor, I said "hey look, so long as the money's green, so long as it's ethical". But I did have to go through the whole e-meter test before I started doing work for them. I twas like something a 3rd grader made with toilet paper rolls and they asked if I was a secret spy.

Stern: Why not hire someone within Scientology? Why would they risk a guy like you who's a loud mouth going around talking...

Chaupetta: ...who's gonna go on Howard Stern and talk about it 10 years later?

Stern: That's right, hire someone from within.

Chaupetta: Because you know what? I have nothing bad to say about them, they're actually nice people, they've been good to me, they were a good client.S
Stern: What do you find out about the people about the people who criticize Scientology?

Chaupetta: Just anything, you just gather intel. Knowledge is power.

Stern: So what are they looking for?

Quivers: What do they care?

Chaupetta: In case it goes into litigation. There are a lot of ex-members that are out there to err....

Stern: You said while you were there, Tom Cruise walks through a secret passage way and then appears in rooms.

Quivers: Maybe he just walks through walls.

Stern: What do you mean, "a secret passageway"

Chaupetta: I was out at erm.... oh god... you know what? Somebody's gonna be watching me now alright. [laughter]. I was at the Celebrity Centre in LA many years ago and he said...they said he came through his secret private entrance. I didn't see it, I didn't know if was like a batcave or anything and he came by, he had a Yankees hat on, I had a soft hat on, he said hi to me, he seemed genuine and was going to study.

Stern: What is the secret entrance? So no one will see him, no one can behold him?

Chaupetta: I guess. I have no clue.

Quivers: He was going to study.

Stern: Study what?

Chaupetta: He was continuing his education.

Stern: I think at this point he knows everything.

Chaupetta: I mean I don't know him personally and I've never done work for him personally but, you know, I was out there on a job.

Stern: Now Scientology doesn't use you any more?

Chaupetta: I haven't done work for them in about 6 or 7 years. They're nice people...

Stern: you think they weren't satisfied with your work?

Chaupetta: Er, No, you know I think they just suffered from recession and I think what they do is that they rotate a lot of different people and it's time to move on with someone else. I already did great work for... I did great work, I was the best trash picker in the fucking U.S.

Stern: And you would find out things? What kind of girls they like? What kind of guys they like? Would you find out if they were seeing homoesexuals and then report that to the Church of Scientology?

Chaupetta: I would just gather the intel, Howard, and then I would give it back, you know "Post-Its", letters, envelopes, addresses. Banana peel you would throw out.

Stern: Did you ever wonder what they were doing with that material? Did you worry that they might be using it to discredit guy or to frame a guy or to do something like that?

Chaupetta: You know what? That's er.. you know again, I wasn't doing anything illegal. Pulling trash is legal if its on a curbside. If you going through a dumpster it's trespassing, it's illegal. So I'm performing my job as a professional investigator to get the trash and peform as a....

Stern: Did you ever turn down a case because you think it's immoral?

Chaupetta: The only case I really turned down recently was a woman who though that someone implanted a listening device in her brain and she wanted to know if I could sweep her head....


Tony Ortega is the editor-in-chief of The Village Voice. Since 1995, he's been writing about Scientology at several publications. Among his other stories about L. Ron Hubbard's organization:

The Larry Wollersheim Saga -- Scientology Finally Pays For Its Fraud
The Tory Bezazian (Christman) Story -- How the Internet Saved A Scientologist From Herself
The Jason Beghe Defection -- A Scientology Celebrity Goes Rogue
The Robert Cipriano Case -- A Hellacious Example of Fair Game
The Paul Haggis Ultimatum -- The 'Crash' Director Tells Scientology to Shove It
The Marc Headley Escape -- 'Tom Cruise Told Me to Talk to a Bottle'
The Aaron Saxton Accusation -- Australia turns up the heat on Scientology
The Jefferson Hawkins Stipulation -- Scientology's former PR genius comes clean
The Daniel Montalvo Double-Cross -- Scientology lures a young defector into a trap
A Church Myth Debunked -- Scientology and Proposition 8
Daniel Montalvo Strikes Back -- Scientology Hit with Stunning Child-Labor Lawsuits
When Scientologists Attack -- The Marty Rathbun Intimidation
A Scientologist Excommunicated -- The Michael Fairman SP Declaration

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38 comments
Magic Shows in Beverly Hills
Magic Shows in Beverly Hills

Hey that's really a great post and a wonderful description out here, I really like the way things are being executed and discussed here.

PamEllis
PamEllis

OSA (google it, there is a wiki page for it) is trying another tactic I see.Rather than pretending to be average joes who just love everything about scientology or current public members, they are posting walls of text. They did this before on the USENET group alt.religion.scientology to try and prevent people reading it..

It has 2 effects. It hides genuine posts and people can't reply to their posts with the real facts.

Looks pretty goofy though.

sketto
sketto

L Ron Hubbard was a fraud. The Joseph Smith of his time. In another hundred years, if Scientology survives, people might even forget what an immoral man Hubbard was.

MarkStark
MarkStark

Joe Smith was piggybacking onto Christianity, a religion that lasted centuries, and became part of Western culture. Wouldn't it be great if Jesus came to America? Yeah!

Scientology is a real departure, in many respects. However, the talk-therapy and neural programming elements have not kept up with advances in those fields.

There are too many Hubbard videos, tapes, documentation and books by and about Hubbard for him to just disappear and rise again in history. For example, Dianetics has gone from the "modern science of mental health," which it was to only a tiny segment of society in the early 1950's, to an impenetrable, meandering piece of pseudo-scientific gibberish and bloated claims, recognized only by some brainwashed cult members, and not even all of them. Why? It just doesn't work that well.

The cult appeals to a select set of people who want to belong to a secret organization (with all the answers) they feel is the only way to save the planet, by ending crime, drug use and education. They'd like to substitute buying into Scientology for education. One little problem. Hubbard used drugs, was a criminal, and wasn't educated, except in the "what is true for you, is true" sense.

Mike
Mike

Typical anti-scientology BS: Take an issue or activity, like hiring a PI, something that is done on a routine basis by most large organizations, and try and trun it into something sinister. Look at a local phone book (for a large city) or do an internet search for PIs and you'll get literally hundreds if not thousands of listings. Scientology is not hiring ALL of them! Someone else must be. This article lists a number of lawsuits the Church is involved in, so there is no suprise that their lawyers hire PIs to gather as much data as possible -- that is neither illegal or unethical.

Guest
Guest

You're right Louanne, the Mormons have Simon&Simon out looking through my trash right now, darn it, can't find the super-soaker filled with jalapeno juice.

MarkStark
MarkStark

Get a grip Louanne. Is it "data gathering" when they sent the Squirrel Busters to Marty's house, right when he's auditing a very fragile former cult member? Is it data gathering when Scientology convinces brainwashed members to sell their kids into Sea Org slavery?

If your mind weren't warped by the cult, and you had a sense of the real world, you'd realize other religions don't send PIs out nearly as much as your nutty cult.

Only your cult of freaks would implicate a writer like Russell Miller in a murder, just to harass him. Only your cult would get caught framing a writer like Paulette Cooper for bomb threats, in attempt to have her put in prison or drive her insane.

Just don't forget Louanne, your cult lost on every count of the suit against Behar/TIME. Just like was mentioned in the TIME article, your cult operates like the mafia, and is more a school for training psychopaths, than a religion. Only Scientology would drive a member to suicide, and then claim any money he left for courses on account, he meant as a donation.

JustCallMeMary
JustCallMeMary

Looks like Chaupetta failed to mention the church gag agreement he was made to sign, which all sign. Saying that they are nice people is not going to get him out of that one.

MarkStark
MarkStark

Interesting, that they put their PIs on the cans. Shouldn't they be put through the purification rundown, just in case? (Can't have impure people going through the garbage cans of others.)

And what do they do about their hired attorneys? Put them on the cans to take a Sci-clesiastical oath:

"Do you f'n swear to tell lies, total lies, and nothing but complete and utter lies, so help you Xenu?"

"By the power of the evil galactic overlord Xenu, Slappy-the-dwarf, the Van Allen belt and the freight trains of Venus, I now pronounce you clear to litigate the crap out of anyone who obstructs planetary salvage."

Jackparsons
Jackparsons

So does this mean Teresa Duncan and Jeremy Blake might have been telling the truth about being stalked by SciTi before they killed themselves?

JustCallMeMary
JustCallMeMary

@jackparsons, that is a good question. I wish they were around to see all the progress that has occured over the last few years with so much media attention to exposing the cult and especially the fairgame tactics it employ against their perceived enemies. Some day all the truth will come on what really happened and I'm looking forward to that. In the meantime, I continue to give Duncan and Blake the benefit of the doubt despite the typical Scientology propaganda that they were nuts.

MarkStark
MarkStark

The remarkable thing is the amount of money Scientology spends on private investigators to follow ex-members, journalists or others. I bet they send PIs to follow some ex-members who don't bring law suits, claiming it is just normal "prophylactic ecclesiastical procedure."

Normal, if you're in a money-sucking cult of alien-possessed brainwashed zombies.

Guest
Guest

Scientologists are the worlds preeminent experts at diagnosing and treating personality disorders, based on the scientific research of L Ron Hubbard, as seen in the Oxford Analysis.

Scientologists are the worlds preeminent experts at diagnosing and treating addictions, based on the scientific research of L Ron Hubbard, as seen in Narconon.

Scientologists are the worlds preeminent experts at diagnosing and treating learning disorders, based on the scientific research of L Ron Hubbard, as seen in Applied Scholastics.

BatshitSPINOSTLOGY
BatshitSPINOSTLOGY

 According to whom ? Themselves ! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHHHAHAHAHHHAHA!!!!! FREAKS!!!!

Tim
Tim

Please ignore the entire internet and buy my cult materials for $100,000.00. Business really getting this tough, OSA, that you would attempt to market on the village voice?

Guest
Guest

Hey OSA, I saw you post this just recently under a different nickname on another site.

Sandra Gortez
Sandra Gortez

BTW, mars friggin .com site has Howard Stern transcripts!

Osama Bin Laden's Death. 05/02/11. 6:00amHoward Says Trump Is Ruining His Brand. 05/02/11. 6:20amSirius XM Channel Line Up Changes. 05/02/11. 6:35amHoward's ''Thor'' Review And More Osama Discussions. 05/02/11. 6:45amThe Boring Royal Wedding. 05/02/11. 7:00amRobin's Internet Chat. 05/02/11. 7:30amLisa G's Howard 100 News Preview. 05/02/11. 7:45amHunter Calls In. 05/02/11. 7:50amMore Osama And Lisa G's News Preview. 05/02/11. 7:55amPhoebe Snow's Memorial Service. 05/02/11. 8:05amHoward Takes Some Phone Calls. 05/02/11. 8:15amHoward Plays Some Clips, Takes Some Calls. 05/02/11. 8:25amWrap Up Preview And More. 05/02/11. 9:05amRobin's News. 05/02/11. 9:25amWrap Up Show - Osama News. 05/02/11. 10:10amWrap Up Show - Ronnie's Man Cave And Girlfriend. 05/02/11. 10:30amWrap Up Show - Tim Sabean. 05/02/11. 10:55am

Guest
Guest

You're really informative today, OSA, but I got the most prominent post so game over, you lose and Anonymous FTW!

Sandra Gortez
Sandra Gortez

BTW, here's a mega Howard Stern site that has transcripts and recaps! ww.marksfriggin.com ...here's from the show on the 2nd!

Osama Bin Laden's Death. 05/02/11. 6:00amHoward Says Trump Is Ruining His Brand. 05/02/11. 6:20amSirius XM Channel Line Up Changes. 05/02/11. 6:35amHoward's ''Thor'' Review And More Osama Discussions. 05/02/11. 6:45amThe Boring Royal Wedding. 05/02/11. 7:00amRobin's Internet Chat. 05/02/11. 7:30amLisa G's Howard 100 News Preview. 05/02/11. 7:45amHunter Calls In. 05/02/11. 7:50amMore Osama And Lisa G's News Preview. 05/02/11. 7:55amPhoebe Snow's Memorial Service. 05/02/11. 8:05amHoward Takes Some Phone Calls. 05/02/11. 8:15amHoward Plays Some Clips, Takes Some Calls. 05/02/11. 8:25amWrap Up Preview And More. 05/02/11. 9:05amRobin's News. 05/02/11. 9:25amWrap Up Show - Osama News. 05/02/11. 10:10amWrap Up Show - Ronnie's Man Cave And Girlfriend. 05/02/11. 10:30amWrap Up Show - Tim Sabean. 05/02/11. 10:55am

Mark
Mark

I guess I started some shit with this segment. Yikes. Well either way I personally never had issue and if one thinks they are being unfairly treated and could face litigation then that is when a PI can come in usefull.

Check out my site www.on-themark.com or www.mydriveinc.com and order my PI book it's lots of laughs.

Thx

Sandra Gortez
Sandra Gortez

Howard Stern is so funny! OMG, I remember the first time I heard him. I could NOT BELIEVE what he was saying! OUTRAGEOUS! Couldn't believe he was getting away with it! What an amazing way to make a living! Lucky him! It looks like he figured out a way to turn his insecurity into an asset! Doesn't he make like, 100 million a year? Wow! Would woulda guessed that was possible?!?!? I wonder what he does with his money? Anyone know if he has an amazing mansion? Or private jet? Or island? Incredible. And now that he's on sirius radio ANYTHING GOES! No censorship at all! I love Howard Stern!

Tim from Uniondale
Tim from Uniondale

If we could all spin our insecurities into that kind of dough, the world would be a better place. One tough part of the whole Howard Stern situation is whoever acts as he second banana in the joke writing department. Jackie the Jokeman: hit the road. Stuttering John: given the axe. Artie Lange: fat, addicted and a danger to yourself is no wat to go through life. if you have to pick, Robin's the one that's held up best. And Gary. Everyone else, not so much.

Guest
Guest

Stuttering John wasn't given the axe, OSA-bot. He quit to work as announcer for Jay Leno. BTW, L Ron Hubbard was fat,addicted, and a danger to himself and other's life savings but you hold the scammer in high esteem.

Garry90069
Garry90069

Mark's real last name is spelled Chaupette. Sadly, he's a special needs parent that is raising twin boys stricken with Muscular Dystrophy. He's produced a documentary on this and his participating in an MMA bout to raise money for his sons. It doesn't excuse his behavior for spying for a destructive cult, but I applaud him in helping those with a terrible disease.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

Flora Bornez
Flora Bornez

Of course people don't like Tom Cruise, he is 1. rich and famous 2. has a gorgeous wife 3. talented 4. handsome....i could go on and on..and on. It's entertaining to read about all of this stuff though, it's straight out of a movie. I come here for my dose of daily comedy now...really though? this is a bit ridiculous, i don't think anyone could read this and take it seriously.

Guest
Guest

You seem to be taking it seriously, Louanne, since you've gone out of your way to comment on it and you've also marshalled all of your sock-puppets to comment on it too.

Guest
Guest

He's not really that talented, Louanne.

Lisa Lirones
Lisa Lirones

better to take advice from a batshit insane Science Fiction writer

Emily
Emily

Where does it say anything about not liking Tom Cruise in this piece? Not that it matters, since the whole "you're just jealous" response has become so predictable and yawn-inducing I can't be arsed to respond. By the by, OSAbot, I hope scientology makes you as happy as you're forced to pretend to be, but if it doesn't, there are lots of folks out here in Wogland, many of them ex-members, who are here to help. You won't be alone if you leave. You are not trapped. Reach out if you ever feel you need to. You'll be amazed how many hands will be there for you.

SFF
SFF

I mostly don't like Tom Cruise because he promotes the "Citizens Commission on Human Rights" view that psychiatrists were behind the Nazi death camps.

There's nothing comedic about exploiting one of the major crimes of the last century in order to attempt to discredit a medical specialty.

SFF
SFF

There was an interesting bit on Jesse Prince's blog about how Scientology always pays PIs through their law firms so it shows up in the books as "legal expenses" and gives them some distance from anything the PIs themselves do.

Nice use of their tax-exempt income.

Guest
Guest

Sup OSA and Louanne sock-puppets! I guess the carpal tunnel is catching up.

I guess since Scientology does not contribute one dollar to anything that would be considered charitable by normal people they have tons of money to pay for stuff like this.

OkayMargarita
OkayMargarita

The first few items that come to mind are inspector gadget, Tom Sawyer, and Huckleberry fin. It's one thing to look to the skies for signs of wonder but its another to set out on heroic missions to find the very truth of our existence as a human race. Unfortunately, most clowns after this kind of thing either conspiracy theorists who aren't necessarily pleased with their own lives and who seek the truth through inciting the clash of perfectly peaceful civilizations. Adolous Huxley wrote about this in his stunning book A Brave New World. The novel was so ahead of its time that it anticipates developments in reproductive capabilities and sleep-learning similar to the kind of stuff Osama Bin-laden was known to be developing. However, he was indeed a sympathetic character, and we identify most with him as he lashed out in despair. His mother, who was stranded in the Reservation and extremely unhappy there, later died upon her return to civilization, in circumstances which further alienate the Catholics. He tried to interrupt the distribution of soma (a powerful drug with no physically harmful side effects) to a group of Athiests, vainly. And perhaps he is only to be pitied in that his choices have been so thoroughly shaped by society, in the end, much the same way as Muammar Gaddafi. Gaddafi is the pawn of the totalitarian society, and some of the comedy has to do with his sexuality which doesn't quite make sense and bothers me. His behaviour is affected by his relationship with the Savage Nordics, but he has no way of seeing outside his perspective (i.e., the perspective society assembled for him).

Guest
Guest

Louanne, personally I like the Beat poets free-association much better.

Guest
Guest

Taking a break from the carpal tunnel, OSA? I bet you just copypasta'd that obfuscation from somewhere.

Bobby Brag Thortonsen
Bobby Brag Thortonsen

You know, it's been said charity starts at home. For me, that means the beautiful Upper Peninsula of Michigan, home to the world's balmiest winters and exceptional stocks of fortified wine. I encourage everyone to take a trip to Marquette, strap on some waders, grab a bottle of Thunderbird and get to fun work of hooking some walleye for a pan fried dinner. It's underrated fun for the entire family and worthy of an RV trip on your next vacation.

Guest
Guest

Really OSA? How's the water there this year, high?

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