Hey, Scientology Celebrity, Here's Your Media Training Checksheet!

Categories: Scientology

Thumbnail image for TomCruiseCrazyEyes.jpg
Cruise, off the rails
Our readers send us the most wonderful things. By e-mail and snail mail, our far-flung correspondents put in our hands Scientology's tasteless fundraising mailers (which we use in our recurring Sunday Funnies posts), they send us over-the-top glossy Scientology magazines, and of course they send us links and videos of Scientologists doing the darndest things.

And then, recently, in the mail, one of our readers sent us some pure gold.

It is a five-page document, and it may be the most precious, hopeful, earnest, presumptious, and ultimately dictatorial artifact I have seen come out of the church in some time.

It is a checksheet, and it is designed to instruct a new celebrity recruit in the arcane ways of L. Ron Hubbard, and how to take Hubbard's greatness to the outside world by learning how to speak to the press about such monumental things.

Five pages. About 50 individual steps. Involving the writing of essays, summarizing of books, using specific words in sentences. And the steps must be done, the document says, in sequence. No exceptions.

One of the steps has the celebrity solving a PR problem by modeling it in clay.

Hey, Tom? Tom Cruise? Um, did you learn how to talk to reporters by first modeling it in clay?

Before I get into specifics about the document, I want to thank the person who mailed it to me, who I am not going to name. (However, if you do want credit it for it here, please e-mail me to let me know. You know who you are.)

The checksheet on its own is a hoot, and provides an enjoyable window into Scientology, particularly of its era. But trying to learn about its provenance and its legacy took me on a bit of a goose chase that in itself was revealing and fun. After I give a more detailed description of the document, I'll relate what I learned from talking with various former Scientology executives who worked with celebrities over several decades.

But first, here's the top portion of the first page, to give you a sense of it:


As you can see, the document is dated June 24, 1977. That was a frightfully significant year for Scientology. Hubbard had finally stopped sailing around the Mediterranean with his mini-Navy and had invaded Clearwater, Florida two years before. Exactly two weeks after this document is dated, the FBI raided Scientology's offices in Washington DC and Los Angeles in what became the church's worst publicity debacle in its history -- discovery of Operation Snow White, its years long infiltration of US government offices. Eleven Scientology executives -- including Hubbard's wife, Mary Sue -- would ultimately go to prison for their part in the conspiracy.

In the calm before that storm, however, this checksheet is concerned with making sure Scientology's new celebrities get proper "hatting" -- that is, training. (In Scientologese, a "hat" is a particular role or job one does, and to be properly trained for that job, one needs "hatting," usually with a checksheet like this, which is often called a "hat pack.")

I've transcribed parts of the rest, leaving out the boring bits (this is Scientology, after all).

In the next portion, there's this statement of what the celebrity will get out of spending the next several hours of his or her life going through this stuff...

PURPOSE: To make celebrities into experts in handling media, so with ARC they can effectively cause public relations actions that will help their careers, and get their good works well publicized and be bigger opinion leaders, and mold public opinion and so be in a better position to get LRH, Scientology and Dianetics well publicized and LRH's technology widely used.


Yes, to repeat: For completing this checksheet, Celebrity Joe or Jane will be taking home a certificate!

Nobody seems to love certificates -- particularly framed, and with big seals and stuff -- like the Scientologists. Just look at them waving them about in this recent video from the Advanced Org in Copenhagen.

("ARC" stands for "affinity, reality, and communication," in Scientology a holy trinity of concepts which adds up to understanding and compassion. Or something. Your nearest Scientologist will talk your ear off about what a genius discovery this triad of concepts was by Hubbard. In general, when a Scientologist signs off a message "with ARC," it sort of means, "with love," but it also means "I should probably get some serious help.")

After each of the items in the five-page checksheet, there are three columns of blank lines, for signatures, so that the celebrity and his handlers could make sure that he's completed each step, in order. (There is no cheating on the test in Scientology.)

Now, let's look at what our celebrity is actually asked to do in order to learn how to talk to reporters and stuff. First up, that favorite of Scientology learning, working the dictionary!

DEFINITIONS: Look up the following words and use in sentences to be sure you understand them and use Admin and Tech Dictionary where applicable. (Scientology, Dianetics, Media, Press, Guardian, Control, Cause, Public Relations, Professional, Appearance, Message, Image, Dissemination, Communication, L. Ron Hubbard, Technology)

I just love the image of John Travolta (who had joined in 1975), or Thomas Mapother IV (1990), leafing through the dictionary and using "dissemination" or "press" in a sentence, don't you?

And now, some individual checksheet items. First up, in a section about how a celebrity should handle a television or radio appearance.

13A. What could you take to the show, to show as evidence that Dianetics is a best-seller?


14C. What message could you get across on LRH?
14D. What message could you get across on Dianetics?
14E. What message could you get across on Scientology?


18A. Choose a suburban type paper.
18B. Write up a short press release on L. Ron Hubbard that is suitable for the public to which it goes.
18C. Sent it to LRH Pers PRO Int for approval to use, and include with the press release a selected LRH article, suitable for that suburban type public to be printed with the press release. Be sure the message goes through both the release and the article.

That's "L. Ron Hubbard Personal Public Relations Office International" being abbreviated in that last item. And note the level of oversight here -- the celebrity is conditioned so that even a minor item in a neighborhood newspaper must be routed through Hubbard's personal, international public relations outfit. Former executives tell me that that level of micromanagement from the highest levels is still very much in place today.

For section 19 on the checksheet, the celebrity is asked to review a policy written by Hubbard in 1969, titled "PRO ACTIONS." In that policy, Hubbard in part explained how to feed the press negative information about psychiatry...

Three weeks of news stories are designed. A pathetic girl abused by psychiatrist comes to C[hurch] of S[cientology] for help to get guidance to right the wrong. That's a story with photos. C of S Committee visited sanitarium. Is refused entrance. That's a story. C of S Committee seeks and can't obtain death records of the sanitarium. That's a story. C of S Committee visits big name in government to force death list to be given out. That's a story. C of S Committee meets with a law society committee to recommend legislation. That's a story. Girl treated by a medical doctor paid for by C of S and Scn processing helps girl. That's another consecutive story. Citizens' Committee urges police action to close sanitarium. That's another story. Girl restored to family by C of S Committee. That's a story. You see what an event is? And what a story is? A PRO gets ideas like this and carries them out and gives them out so they'll get published.

In order to make sure this lesson sinks in...

19B. Do in clay.

"The 'clay table training' was done constantly with many courses," says Skip Press, a screenwriter and former Scientologist, who was around Scientology celebrities in the 1970s. "The basic idea was that the clay acted as 'mass' so that your mind could see in real life the 'significance' of ideas in your mind. Hubbard said you needed a balance of mass and significance before you could have 'cognition' (realization) of something. A 'clay demo' would be judged by the course supervisor. If that person could look at what you had demonstrated in clay and knew what was going on, then you 'got it.' Tiny pieces of paper with labels would be used to show what each object was like 'police officer' or 'megaphone' or whatever."

I think the idea of Travolta or Karen Black squeezing out a few little clay reporters with paper labels for a course supervisor is my favorite Scientology image in like a month.

More items, as things get a bit more confrontational...

19C. Name a specific public group.

19F. Write a short attack on some enemy of this group that you could use on the radio show (be sure you have documented proof on your attack).


20A. What is Hard News?
20B. Draw up the outline of a plan of something you could do for hard news - circus type.
20C. Write an essay on how you will use invalidation, controversy and two opposing forces in your story and harm, sex, money and big names.


21A. Write a list of rumors you could be given to handle on you.


31A. Tell someone what you know about LRH.
31B. Write a short biography on his life.


32B. Write essay on what Dianetics is and what it does.


36B. List things with which you have had trouble before, on TV, radio or in press interviews or during public events, get bullbaited on them and flatten.

That last item is very revealing, and shows how useful this kind of training could be. Scientology understands that the best way to lessen the impact of a cruel comment is not to avoid it, but to hear it shouted at you, over and over again. After "People think you're gay!" has been screamed at Tom Cruise hundreds of times by short people in naval outfits, and he can take it without flinching, then he really isn't going to react to what the public or the press throws at him. (I don't know that Cruise was bull-baited in this way, but it would seem like a useful exercise, doesn't it?)

After completing all of the items on the checksheet, our celebrity is then asked to sign his name under this statement:

I attest to having done the above materials per the checksheet, and that I have no misunderstood words, that I know and will apply the data.

But, and here's the question that I took to numerous former Scientology executives, did any celebrity actually go through this thing?

I first turned to Mike Rinder, formerly Scientology's top spokesman, and someone who was very familiar with its celebrities for decades before his 2007 defection.

"I'm certainly familiar with getting celebrities to talk to the press about the church. Tom Cruise was good at that, but it turned into a nightmare for War of the Worlds," he says, referring to Cruise's 2005 freakout.

Rinder says that celebrities are trained to talk to the press, and are trotted out when the church believes it will help. "Yes, it is definitely a strategy that gets employed to deal with the media and use them as spokespeople, but also as bait," he says, explaining that he would offer interviews with celebrities in exchange for friendly treatment.

When the BBC was doing a major piece on its Panorama program about Scientology in 2007, Rinder says he knew it would be critical, but also knew that he could temper it somewhat by sending over celebrities to be a part of it.

"Tommy Davis and I set up interviews for the BBC with all sorts of people. Anne Archer. Juliette Lewis. Maybe Jenna. They want to use the footage of the celebrities for the ratings, and if you can get the celebrities saying good things, that's minutes of the program used for positive messages," he says.

But if the celebrities were trained how to talk about Scientology, does he remember a checksheet like the one from 1977? He said he didn't.

"I can't imagine that Cruise, or Travolta or Kirstie Alley would have been asked to do something like that," he added.

I then turned to another top former executive, Marty Rathbun, who agreed with Rinder that Scientology celebrities do get extensive training for how to talk about Scientology with the press.

"Look at the tapes from [BBC journalist] John Sweeney. Anne Archer and the others. They're drilled like barking seals. You don't just put them in front of an audience. You drill them," Rathbun says. "They needed to be hatted to be able to handle media. Look at Jenna Elfman. People had to be trained. I don't recall a checklist, but it was always, 'is the guy hatted,' meaning trained."

Rathbun brought up the infamous 2005 incident, when perhaps the "hatting" had gone a bit too far.

"Look at Tom Cruise, and how he was talking on television. That wasn't him. It was [church leader] David Miscavige," Rathbun says.

Despite his assurances that celebrities get plenty of training, Rathbun also wasn't familiar with the checksheet. So I turned next to a celebrity.

Michael Fairman is one of our favorite former Scientologists. A terrific character actor we've all seen many times on television, he recently left the church after many years as one of its more recognizable members -- he appeared in Scientology television commercials and its internal films -- and then went public with his disaffection in a big way.

"Yeah, I remember," he said when I asked him about being trained to talk to the media. "I was trained not with a 50-item checksheet. But I was given certain policies about how to talk to the press. I was hatted, not intensively, but I was hatted somewhat, how to speak to the media."

Fairman had joined in the early 1980s. Another familiar character actor, Jason Beghe, had joined in the 1990s, and also left a few years ago. I asked him if during his era, he also received training for how to talk to the media.

"Oh yeah. I was trained by a woman from South Africa. Older. Classy broad. Her name was Christina Lowe. She was a PR expert, and she trained me," Jason told me. "It was smart. It was about how to answer a question in a way that made you comfortable. She would just drill you, acting like a press person. It wasn't only about Scientology. It was in general."

After working with her, Beghe remembers, Lowe just "sort of vanished." Today, he says, celebrities get trained with the use of a book.

"They have this thing now, you get drilled on this book, What is Scientology." The heavy tome, sometimes called "WIS" (pronounced "wiz") is a very familiar one. I think at one time Scientology had mailed me four of the things. Beghe says that there's an index of frequently asked questions about Scientology which celebrities are drilled on these days. "It covers everything they could ask you about Scientology -- except for the hardcore Xenu stuff, which they're not going to tell you about," he says, referring to the upper-level "OT III" materials about the galactic overlord Xenu and the disembodied alien souls inhabiting our bodies, which Scientologists are not told about until they're a couple hundred thousand dollars into their years long training.

I was learning a lot about how celebrities are trained to talk to the media in Scientology, but I was no closer to learning about this particular checksheet. I had to go back further.

So I talked to Nancy Many, whose long and wild Scientology career we've written about before. Back in the 1970s, she had overseen all Celebrity Centres, at the International office. And she thinks she remembers which specific celebrity debacle had prompted the checksheet being produced.

Blake as Baretta (with Fred)
Since Hubbard had come up with Project Celebrity in the mid-50's, executives like Many were charged with going after every up and coming actor for lovebombing to get them into the fold. And in 1975, a hit new series, Baretta, had them salivating over its star, Robert Blake.

Many says their "in" was Blake's co-star on the series, Michael D. Roberts, who was a Scientologist. Through Roberts, they worked and worked to get Blake in for courses.

But then, in 1977, Many says, in an appearance on The Tonight Show, Blake ridiculed Scientology, and it was considered a huge embarrassment inside the church.

The executive who had been charged with getting Blake in was immediately sent to the RPF, Scientology's prison detail, Many says.

She thinks the checksheet may have been produced at that time as a result, to make sure that celebrities would be under tighter control.

She also points out that the person who wrote the checksheet, Yvonne Jentzsch, was only months away from death.

Skip Press recently wrote a terrific story about Jentzsch, who had helped set up Celebrity Centres around the country but was unappreciated by Hubbard, who sent her to PRO -- his personal public relations office -- where she produced this checksheet. She then developed brain cancer, and Press gives the impression that her dedication to Hubbard, and his disregard for her, hurried her demise.

In the piece, Press also makes Jentzsch seem like a wise and reasonable person who was unappreciated. But this checksheet is wacky. I asked Skip how to reconcile that.

"Yvonne seemed wise and reasonable," he answered in an e-mail this morning. "Basically, she was a kindergarten teacher with that kind of caring personality. Like a fairy godmother. She was also very naive. I performed some at Celebrity Centre and got a standing ovation once. I tried to talk her into letting me leave staff to become a rock star, which I told her would take a couple of years. She said 'we probably don't have that much time.' She was convinced that if Scientology wasn't spread quickly enough there would be a nuclear war across the planet (this was about 1975 as I recall)."

Skip and others suggested that I talk to a person who worked closely with Yvonne, who I am not going to name in this story. That person definitely remembered the checksheet.

The person says celebrities needed training because they were so clueless. Travolta, for example, had at one time talked to reporters about specifics of Hubbard's technology, and of course, it had disastrous results.

"They would do stupid shit. We told them they could only talk about what it had done for them. Don't talk about the technology," the person says.

Again, I asked, could the person remember any particular celebrity doing the checksheet, in its entirety?

No, I was told. But celebrities were definitely trained, drilled, and even punished. I asked for an example, and was told about a 1970s film director, very big at the time, on his hands and knees, cleaning the parking lot of the old Hollywood Celebrity Centre on 8th Street.


Well, I hadn't hit paydirt with stories of particular actors or actresses drilling the checksheet, but I had learned a lot about the handling of celebrities, particularly at a certain time in Scientology's history. Like other documents I have run across from the church, this one was probably put together not so much for the celebrities it seems written for, but for Jentzsch's superiors, to show that she and others in the PRO wing were doing what they could to get celebrities under control.

And Rinder, Rathbun, Beghe and the others assure, me that kind of training and control is still very much going on today.

Postscript: Speaking of celebrities, the lovely and talented Janet Reitman, author of the terrific history, Inside Scientology, will be appearing Tuesday evening at University Settlement, hosted by the Center for Inquiry. Admission is only 5 bucks, and Janet will be interviewed about her book by yours truly. So come on out for the good times.

The Top 25 People Crippling Scientology
#1: L. Ron Hubbard
#2: David Miscavige
#3: Marty Rathbun
#4: Tom Cruise
#5: Joe Childs and Tom Tobin
#6: Anonymous
#7: Mark Bunker
#8: Mike Rinder
#9: Jason Beghe
#10: Lisa McPherson
#11: Nick Xenophon (and other public servants)
#12: Tommy Davis (and other hapless church executives)
#13: Janet Reitman (and other journalists)
#14: Tory Christman (and other noisy ex-Scientologists)
#15: Andreas Heldal-Lund (and other old time church critics)
#16: Marc and Claire Headley, escapees of the church's HQ
#17: Jefferson Hawkins, the man behind the TV volcano
#18: Amy Scobee, former Sea Org executive
#19: The Squirrel Busters (and the church's other thugs and goons)
#20: Trey Parker and Matt Stone (and other media figures)
#21: Kendrick Moxon, attorney for the church
#22: Jamie DeWolf (and other L. Ron Hubbard family members)
#23: Ken Dandar (and other attorneys who litigate against the church)
#24: David Touretzky (and other academics)
#25: Xenu, galactic overlord

Tony Ortega is the editor-in-chief of The Village Voice. Since 1995, he's been writing about Scientology at several publications.

tortega@villagevoice.com | @VoiceTonyO | Facebook: Tony Ortega

Keep up on all of our New York news coverage at this blog, Runnin' Scared


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I wonder if Stacy Francis is following a new "checklist" of late. She recently gave an interview, and when asked if she were a Scilon, could only say.

Now they say I'm a Scientologist. Later on down. "I'm a Christian."

She has also used the words "affinity" and "invalidate" in interviews, as only a Scilon would, and talks about having to be able to "feed her children" while she was feeding her mind with 17 courses at the Scilon Celebrity Center, until 2010.

I'm curious about this. Is this what Scilons are told to do now? Deny being a Scilon.

Or, is this just Stacy, realizing that Scientology has such a bad rep, she wants to protect her image. If so, that makes sense. However, it confirms that she also lies at the drop of a hat. They should ask her if she lies because she's a Scilon or was she always a liar.

Personal Trainer Directory
Personal Trainer Directory

Famous Scientology amateur on video claiming he is the alone one who can absolutely advice at an auto accident. That's a story. 


You guys are doing a heck of a job.  You've got to be one of the major players that are helping Scientology, LRH and DM, be shown for the internet laughing stocks they richly deserve to be.  However, I'll change my mind about all that today, if someone can show me one OT power, in a controlled, laboratory condition.


Just two things:  1) Yvonne was a very amazing lady.  She cared.  She was perceptive, sensitive.  Not naive. A superb executive. Skip may think her naive because of her statement about "not enough time" but consider that her view wasn't so far off when you consider that each person looks at life through his/her own existant "case" and that she died in a couple of years after that.  

2) I'm sure LRH appreciated Yvonne.  Everyone appreciated Yvonne.  I remember her at the Paladium introducing speakers.  Speakers are normally given lots of applause at the end of their speeches, but one person was kind of taking a long time to explain his environmental impact knowledge, and he got his applause in mid sentence.  The speaker was a bit startled but a gentleman, accepted the applause and shut up.  I overheard Yvonne say in surprise, "they cut him off" and she promptly went up front and did a short "assist" group session were the audience could particpate and get over their boredom.  She was so sentient and very, very able.



 There's some story making the current rounds about Kelly Preston losing 39 pounds, it might be my imagination but everytime the SP Times does a series or some embarrasing fact like a woman claiming to be held on a ship for 12 years comes out then bang, a Scientology celebrity "success story" about how Scientology helped people recover from the death of their child, lost weight, some nonsense on Haiti,etc....


I should add a story from the mid-70s when Celebrity Centre was on 8th Street near downtown L.A. One of the prominent celebrities at the time was actress Anne Francis (who not that long before had her own TV series, Honey West). Diana Hubbard was in charge of all the Division Sixes (public division) and made it known in writing that "The purpose of Div. 6 is to capture and control the public." Anne took one look at that and took off like a rocket in her movie "Forbidden Planet" and never came back. Even sweet-talking Yvonne Jentzsch couldn't get through to her.


This document is obviously a lie manufactured by Tony Ortega. Here are the outpoints:

1. "A pathetic girl abused by psychiatrist comes to Church of Scientology for help to get guidance to right the wrong."  FALSE. WE IN THE CHURCH DO NOT TAKE PSYCH PATIENTS. THEY ARE ILLEGAL PC'S

2. C of S Committee visited sanitarium. FALSE: WE DO NOT VISIT PSYCH BUTCHER SHOPS.

3. C of S Committee seeks and can't obtain death records of the sanitarium. WE DON'T NEED DEATH RECORDS BECAUSE WE KNOW THAT PSYCHIATRY KILLS ALL OF ITS PATIENTS.

4. C of S Committee visits big name in government to force death list to be given out. FALSE: WE SEND IN BIG LEGAL FIRMS TO SUE. WE ONLY USE GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS TO STOP WHITE HOUSE OR FBI INVESTIGATIONS OF US.

5. C of S Committee meets with a law society committee to recommend legislation. FALSE: WE USE CCHR AND HIGHLY-PAID LOBBYISTS TO CRAM LEGISLATION DOWN THE THROATS OF ELECTED LEADERS ON OUR PAYROLL.




SP 'Onage
SP 'Onage

Thank you (nameless reader) for sending the Media Training Checksheet to Tony. :-)


I've got an equitable solution for the celebrity/slave situation in cuckoo-land. Cut the baby in half. Let Miscavige have the celebrities, any of the flying monkeys who want to stay with him, and all the empty buildings.

Give Martypants half the liquid assets, of at least 1 billion, to set up Hubtardology (or whatever he wants to call it) that operates as a home business only. Indie auditors can buy a franchise for only a $1, and they can get all secret elixirs, potions, and religious gear (emeters, restraints etc.) at cost from small factories or home businesses run by Marty.

Miscavige and the celebrities can save the planet, while Marty and his group can save mankind. The sectors of the galaxy for salvage can be divided evenly. Any worker who wants to leave will be given a sizable pension. A fund needs to be set up to assist struggling psycho, disgruntled, overly sane and other forms of apostate.


I think this checksheet went the way of many Guardian Office docs at that time... to the shredder.

From my recollection, celebrities were handled individually on what to say to the press, to whom, and instant hatted on policies as needed in advance or as a consequence of situations.

However, in the early 1980's many celebrities were made Honorary LRH Personal PRO's and did the hatting checksheet for that "hat". In 2007 someone at ESMB named Takin Time posted that he has the checksheet for such a course, although I am thinkiing of an earlier checksheet circa 1979, 1980. Takin Time wrote:

"I have a copy of an "Honorary LRH Personal PRO Hat Checksheet" if you want a copy. Says "Pilot", LRHED 874RA 26 Sept 1988 rev 4.6.95. But I don't suppose there's anything confidential in there.

Contact me by private message if you want a copy"http://www.forum.exscn.net/sho...


Citizen's Commission president urges young girl to lie about sexual abuse.  That's a story.


Yeoman's work as usual, Tony, great job. Never forget this - most of the top $cientology celebrities are horribly educated. Far as I know, Travolta only went as far as the sixth grade. I don't think Miscavige finished high school. Anne Archer was a horrible student - she told me so herself. And what few people seem to remember is that at Celebrity Centre when it moved to its current location - the former Chateau Elysee that was for years called "The Manor" because $cientologists could also live there - there was a SEPARATE courseroom for celebrities like Priscilla Presley. I asked about that once. After all, if you were "qualified" in the eyes of $cientology to take courses there (as I was, having achieved that status in the broad world post-staff, but who cares), then shouldn't everyone use the same course rooms? Hubbard appealed CONSTANTLY to vanity with his baloney "OT powers" and that's why many of them joined and are still there. Deluded fools.


On an unrelated note, there was an ESMB post indicating that the Church of Scientology is holding an "ONLINE PR & SOCIAL MEDIA Training Seminar" in December.

While that concept is funny enough on its own, they are hosting it on the Freewinds.

I wonder if Barbara Streisand will be a special guest speaker.

Skwerl King
Skwerl King

The checklist is a perfect example of a compliance routine. I've been studying such compliance techniques and this one has all the bells and whistles. I especially like the clay modeling because it make the inductee really think about their words and actions, plus with a little nudge form the teacher, they are helped to the correct answer. And that answer brings them a little reward: a certificate and some love bombing. See Robert Caldini's work for more information.


  Why don't they treat everybody the way they treat celebrities?

SP 'Onage
SP 'Onage

Sorry for going off topic. I just read this:

Former “sheriff of the year” arrested and sent to jail named after himBy Eric Pfeiffer | The Sideshow - 1 hr 50 mins ago

Every civil servant wants to experience his or her legacy firsthand--but not the way that onetime Arapahoe Sheriff Patrick J. Sullivan Jr. has. Sullivan, a nationally renowned law enforcement leader, was arrested on drug charges and is now being detained in the same Denver area jail that was named after him.

He was subsequently arrested by the South Metro Drug Task Force and is currently being held on a $250,000 bond.

In 1995 President Bill Clinton named Sullivan to the National Commission on Crime Prevention and Control. According to a 1995 White House news release, Sullivan was a consultant to U.S. House Subcommittee on Crime and served on two advisory councils affiliated with the Department of Justice.

Isn't he buddies with the scilons?

Karmas a bitch tiny Dave.


Amazing how many Scientologists need common sense spoon-feeding to them.

I wonder if there's a Scientology checksheet explaining how to wipe your backside?


dodobird, you're aptly named, and naive. I saw Yvonne Jentzsch announce to the assembled staff at CC in 1976 that Ron had told her Henry Kissinger was really a KGB agent. As for Hubbard appreciating her, sure he did - he hit on her, he did his best to bed her, and it freaked her out (after all, she was married and so was he), and that's a big reason she took off for Los Angeles. Don't come around with your surface baloney impressions when that's all you have to hand.


poor John T., stuck with that looney as a beard


You know what? That is SO true - I'm a little slow on the uptake, but I completely agree. And because the last one with Kelly baawing about how schlimo-tology helped her thru Jett's death got so much pick-up from other outlets when there was a concurrent tortega story (which one? Not gonna look it up, it's late), they decided to use her again. WTF with the media love for this nobody? (Sorry, never have been impressed.)

Very excellent point, Guest.

CofS Exit Zone
CofS Exit Zone

(drools) Ohhhh please do add that story, Skip. Your insights on days gone by is fascinating & I cant get enough.


"capture and control"  Now who wouldn't want to stick around for that to see what happens.


Good memory Skip.  How about Marion Wagner (ex wife of Robert Wagner) AND Stanley Donen (whose son Peter joined the Sea Org for a brief bit).

Or the heir or heiress of Lear Jet - audited by Carmine Terra in the field and flapped to hi heaven.

Or Peggy Lipton?

Or Al Jarreau -

I'm not sure that this checksheet wasn't written when Yvonne was AT Flag - called there not by LRH but by Diana as she noticed Yvonne wasn't answering telexes etc.  Diana and Yvonne were actually quite close.

It makes more sense to me that Yvonne wrote the checksheet while at Flag and therefore much of it is tailored to the Personal Public Relations Office all of whom from that time I believe are long gone out of scientology.


That's the way it's going anyway; the FreeZone/Independent Scientologists are providing the services (including used e-meters, books, NOTs packs, etc.) while official Scientology is hanging on to the buildings and selling CDs of Hubbard's ramblings (most you can get real cheap used on eBay.)

Remember "The Basics" they were selling for 1000 bucks? I got most of it, plus a large collection of tapes (including Ron's Journal 67) for 30 bucks*. Off eBay. They sell the older e-meters for $200 - if you know how to read a schematic and solder, you can build one for 12-20 clams, depending on how nice you want it to look. Like they say in the Church of the Subgenius "Why pay to have somebody else pull the wool over your eyes?" The era of the low rent Dianetics/Scientology futzer is here!


* I'm not joining Unkie Ron's Freek Fleet; I bought these tomes for research (my library system has purged itself of non-fiction Hubbard books), that and "The Satanic Bible" isn't funny anymore.


You're right about that, Mary. The course was very popular around CC in the 80s, and cheap. I have a copy of that "hat" as well.


" there was a SEPARATE courseroom for celebrities like Priscilla Presley."

Skip, you know Lisa Marie is out of the cult now right?


Used to be a mass marketing game; volume sales, didn't matter most caught on and left under a year.  Scientology started out as the Walmart of new age voodoo service and product line.  It's gone to the extreme end of game days now;  cannibalizing the few beached whales, whether celeb, wealthy, or the few they financially feed through the tubes; all seem to me to be narcissists or masochists, considering the insane current environment.  Can't think of any other explanation.

Now it's a Rodeo Drive boutique product-only line.  Education and intelligence were never critical components of "name, want and get your product".  heh

Nancy Many
Nancy Many

I am certain that many of the books and Public Relations writings in Tony's checksheet are still being used.  Any interesting titles Tony???


Oops. Looks like it is merely _presented_ by the Freewinds. Not actually on the boat itself.

Skwerl King
Skwerl King

That's Robert Cialdini for anyone interested.

Nancy Many
Nancy Many

I just noticed the "pilot" on the issue.  That means that this was to be tested out on individuals.  It may never have worked and never have been used broadly, but all the drills and comments regarding these are all true, they were being used back then and they are being used now.Many of the celebrities I worked with were not well educated.  They either did not have the attention span to sit for an entire course, or they simply could not deal with the length of this course --- even if offered for free (which I am certain this course was).

Robert Eckert
Robert Eckert

"I wonder if there's a Scientology checksheet explaining how to wipe your backside?"Of course there is!  That's why there are so many "ass-hats" in Scientology. (rim shot)


Yes! The Tech clearly states wiping your backside or geting a friend to help out, is the best way to remove clusters of body thetans, klingons and dingleberries.


The celebrities need to be drilled on what they are allowed to say it means to them. Otherwise, they might say what it really means to them and get in trouble?

Scientology is utterly meaningless (it is what is true for you) by itself, yet people aren't even suppose to say what it means to them.

You end up with people like Rinder and Rathbun, who even when they get out, STILL can't talk about what Xenu means to them! Yet Xenu meant so much to Hubbard, he created a whole EXPENSIVE OT level around the story, with lies about people dying of pneumonia if they read it before they are ready. What an obvious con game to those outside the brainwashing.


After the cult floundered over the story of neglect, where Scilons, including Sci-manny, partied, while Jett seized, fell and died -- including all the issues over autism -- the cult successfully recycled that story as a diversion several times. They spun it as being all about John or Kelly or John and Kelly overcoming grief and tragedy using Sciloontology.

When baby Ben was on the way and finally born, it was more opportunities to remind readers of their tragedy, and the Scilon miracle that was bestowed by Xenu/Hubbard or something/someone. A woman of Kelly's age and slight figure couldn't be as fertile as she was, having gone through so much grief, without Sciloontology, many shots of Clomid and a team of fertility doctors, including turkey baster technicians, working 'round the clock to introduce John's sperm into her at just the optimal moment. A true love story for this age of Sciloontology expansion. Buildings bursting with new members. Wombs filling with new scilebrity life.

Even with this Scilon-assisted weight loss triumph, there were Scilons in the comments bringing up Jett's death again, and "all they've been through..."

Sciloontology is perfect for:

1. Overcoming tragedy2. Regaining hope3. Creating new life against heavy odds4. Raising healthy, happy, talented children5. Keeping floors clean and shiny6. Keeping beards trimmed and neat7. Publicity for has-been celebrities and their wives8. And now, LOSING WEIGHT! Except Kirstie appears to be stalled on her diet, but she's probably overcoming the unhappiness of still being fat by using Sciloontology.

Celebrities* are not only good for promoting Sciloontology, Sciloontology is great for promoting celebrities.

*except for Tom Cruise


Well, "Zone", that's basically the story. Anne was into metaphysics both before and after $cientology, and she became much happier in that study after leaving Hubbard's little "control zone."


Marion's buddy Flo Allen brought her client Rock Hudson in to try auditing once. I used to talk to those two ladies all the time when I ran the snack bar on 8th Street. I remember Al fondly from La Brea days - he was in and out of $cientology several times before checking out for good. Speaking of PRO and Flag, I think it's hilarious that one of the biggest enemies of the church with testimony at court cases has been Laurel Sullivan, Hubbard's person PR lady in those days. I'm so glad about all the people who woke up, and it's a share Diana hasn't been able to, unlike her siblings.


any true fax on this?  god, i hope so.


I did not but I certainly suspected it was coming - http://www.themortonreport.com... - that sure makes me smile, hope it does her. Please email with details if you will; I always liked Lisa when I was around her.

Tye Solaris
Tye Solaris

Really?.... is the Freewinds a 'person' now?


I noticed that right off, Nancy, because it was an SO ED in the first place.  Lots of pilots on SO ED's, remember?  Let's face it we were all human guinea pigs, much like those hothouse tomatoes (ha).

This whole subject about celebrities in scientology being controlled and handled before speaking in public is because for the general public and stuff, every step every week is designed to build an invisible layer Shielding, Obscuring and Distorting your view of the outside of ScientologyWorld.  

That's why you hear about those exiting scientology going through this peeling the onion layers when they deprogram or compress from it all.  There is a very real process that occurs over time, depending on how much of it you gave in a day or week and how much money, how much family, social, business, career, and most of all, hope, dreams and believing you will triumph over death.  That last one is a sharp-edged hook.

Celebrities, on the other hand, somehow have to expand their public exposure.  That's a conundrum for scientology handlers.  Their success with any celebirty was only achieved when the person involved already possessed (and highly valued)  their own preordained distorted view of life, people and the world they revolved around.  Just compare those that "passed the audition (drill)" and those that did not.

Tye Solaris
Tye Solaris

Too Funny....."not well educated"... you are being too kind Nancy.

The whole notion and hype built around the word "Celebrity" ... is without merit.. for the most part. Effectively ? ..... it is meaningless.

Assigning abilities and knowledge and perception to people who do not really possess any of those attributes in any significant quantities..... Cruise has become the poster boy for this.... so worldly..... and so completely clueless.


About that pneumonia. This solves the mystery in last Friday's "Orders of the Day"- article, where LRH blamed Roche for the flu. It was'nt Roche after all, it was some raw pre-released OT III material.


the closest thing i have on this is a rebuttal to a National Enquirer cover story Lisa's rep issued to People Magazine regarding a possible nervous breakdown and treatment from the Co$. they said she was not getting help from the Co$. She's been really reclusive as of late...


I don't know. Ask the US Supreme Court.


There were very few "privileges"  in scientology, that's for sure, and none that cost the corporation one thin dime. 

Well, it turns out that "knowledge is power thing" was Almost right.  A sound and well rounded education is the best antidote and vaccination against the many consequences of running into Stupid.  Scientology wasn't my only stupid, but it merits #1 on the list!

I am so glad you are doing well and pursuing a field that frankly, many are put off after coming down with a bad case of scientology.  And thank you for all the unselfish help you have given so freely. 

What I hate the most about scientology is that it seeks out and then sucks up the human desire of helping and making the world a little better.  I'm glad you obviously held a little in reserve and are carrying on.  There were many, many downright awesome giants, pioneers, and true humanitarians that I have known and met, and some I never met, on that sci journey.  Most of the "celebs" I knew were b-list or in another category than arts; most were fun and funny and warmhearted.   Just because the bridge turned out to be a gutter doesn't make any less of those that I knew.  I have no doubt that you will do well, but most importantly, be happy. 

Nancy Many
Nancy Many

I like your use of 'decompression",  it is what happens with all of us when we leave, while we are in we are not given any time in which to "Unfold our Personal Thoughts" with regards to anything.

Busy Busy - on to the next.

I clearly remember on my first college course on Philosophy (after I was out) showed me the many other men who came up with Hubbards Thoughts  some thousands of years before him.  I could have studied them directly instead of having them filtered through Hubbard.

And Skip, I too was in the privaleged secret course room, I am sure that was because of my husband and all the celebrities I was "FSM"ing.


should be "general public and staff"

Nancy Many
Nancy Many

Well what else was I supposed to say!!!!  Most were and are being "drilled" or "practicing" prior to any media contact.

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