Gingrich Tells Romney to Drop the 'Pious Baloney'; Which Baloney is he Talking About?

GingrichBaloney.jpg
The GOP debates have essentially turned into a traveling theater production, and today's matinee in New Hampshire was surprisingly energetic given their late performance last night. After going easy on Romney yesterday, the other candidates tried to stick it to him during this morning's MSNBC debate. The barb that everyone will be talking about came from Newt Gingrich when he told Romney to "drop a little bit of the pious baloney" when talking about his career outside politics. Video after the jump.

The question obviously isn't whether or not Gingrich had a valid point, but rather what baloney was he talking about, specifically? Baloney (or bologna) is a much-maligned meat that has been called a lot of things, but rarely "pious." Considering all the baloney options behind your local deli counter, we take a look at which ones are the most pious.

BaloneyBoarsHead.jpg

Boar's Head Bologna
At first glance, this is a pretty standard, plain, everyman bologna. But when you realize that Boar's Head has an ad campaign boasting that they've kept sodium down in their deli meats for years, you start to see the piousness creep in.

Pious Scale: 3 out of 5 Romneys

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Hebrew National Beef Bologna
Despite having "Hebrew" in its name with all its religious connotations, this bologna is remarkably un-pious. Tastes great on challah.

Pious Scale: 1 Romney

BaloneyKarlEhmer.jpg

Karl Ehmer Bologna
This is a classic bologna, steeped in "old world" traditions. Yeah, that sounds pretty pious to us.

Pious scale: 3 1/2 Romneys

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Oscar Mayer Beef Baloney
A real hard hat, lunch pail baloney. We're not even going to call it "bologna," because that fancy spelling wouldn't truly represent just how blue collar this lunch meat is. Doesn't even know the definition of pious.

Pious scale: 0 Romneys

TurkeyBaloney.jpg

Applegate Uncured Turkey Bologna
Christ. This bologna is made of turkey and is "heart smart." It also costs a full two dollars more per pound. Alright, Applegate, cut this pious B.S.

Pious scale: 5 Romneys

Newt To Mitt: "Drop The Pious Baloney" [BuzzFeed]

[@nickgreene][ngreene@villagevoice.com]

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Tony
Tony

This country should stop worring about who has what and worry about who can lead this country. Newt Gingrich has just as many private things as the rest of us; this is none of our business.  He is smart, knows the ropes, is direct, has a plan.........no one else does!!!!  

This president only want's to knock Newt because he knowes he is the only one who can stand up to him. This president has put this country on the road to destruction, if you are on a social program you love him, if you are illegal you love him, if you work pay taxe's, pay out of pocket for all the low lifes this president wants as voters.............you will hate this man.

I am not in favor of Newt but............ He is strong, has a plan, has done good in the past, and I don't care if he made millions. God bless him that what this country is all about...........you work, you prosper....you live off the goverment, you get nowhere and vote for who they tell youso the checks keep comming. They will keep you where they want you........never to think outside the box.

Mitt nice guy .go to dinner ....strong no ..run the country...........CANT to weak 

Who every you vote for make it count.our children the now and the future need this.

@JoeWatchesTV
@JoeWatchesTV

What I learned from this piece is that you can misspell bologna a number of ways. But that's it.

 cummly9-10
cummly9-10

All I have to say is after living in Atlanta Georgia most of my life. Newt Gingrich is one of the biggest deceiving phonies in the GOP three ring circus act! Ithink it's time for some real entertainment, performing animals, we have seen the clowns, feats of skill and daring pageantry. Oh that's right we have seen the pageantry ,the pig with lip-stick on the pig. That could do the fancy elaborate pageant talking pageant walking nut-cake. But boy she sure can gut an Alaskan bull moose real dan fine and dandy. Oh that's right we are talking about that brilliantly colored slimy salamander named Gingrich ordering Mr. Romney to Drop the 'Pious Baloney'. Well I would guess that Newt being a Catholic he would have an ideology of piousness! Or some kind of delusional dogma. BARK, BARK, BARK. Maybe he he should be checked for rabies! And three marriages under his pop-in fresh dough-boy's belt! Well so much for the GOP's circle of clowns. Take Em out old Dr. Paul.

Capedales
Capedales

"Cummly", enough said.

Cummly9-10
Cummly9-10

"Capedales", I THINK NOT DUDE! Newt Gingrich, and the GOP. Bigots = a person who is extremely intolerant of another person's race, creed, or opion that differs from ones own prejudices! I'm white,and 67 years old. I would think that after all of the tens of thousands of years of mankinds journey of thought that we would be of a far noble fabric of GOD'S handy-works! Than the lowly selfserving parasites that we are. I've been tought to be a mindful-thinker. I have never belong to the ordi indifferent, the flat earth-society, or any other mind control orders of indoctrinations. Hate, fear, intolerance of others color, race, or sexual-preference is what is the basic cause of all this world's misery and suffering. I THINK NOT Capedales. There is never enough said about the "Selfrighteous, and the Holyer than tho Pious." Calling the kettle black. We need more than one liners.

Gary Holbrook
Gary Holbrook

Now you've confused me.  I try to make the process of buying Bolonga or Baloney as simple as possible.  I buy my choice in the reduced price Bin and only check the amoint of Sodium in it.

I slather up two pieces of white bread with margarine, mayo, and pIickle relish and put two slabs of the product on one piece of bread and than toss the other peice on real fast.

It is sooo good.

I see Romney eating watercress sadwiches and tuna on a Ritz cracker.

Newt?  Anything that is hot and juicy.

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