Dog Soldiers: Rightbloggers Meld with Mitt over Obama Mutt Meal Story

tomt200.jpgFor months, the growing probability that Mitt Romney, least acceptably conservative of the Republican Presidential contenders, would face Obama in November made rightbloggers moody and irritable.

They've been coming around, but slowly. When Newt Gingrich's supporters attacked Romney's years as a corporate raider, and Hilary Rosen sassed his wife Ann, some rightbloggers reflexively rallied to Romney's defense. Still, a more positive motivation for Mittism was lacking.

That came last week, via an old story about Obama eating dog meat as a boy.

Jim Treacher of the DC Trawler called out a passage from Obama's Dreams from my Father, showing that as a child in Indonesia the future President had eaten, among other exotic dishes, dog meat. Thus, jested Treacher, if you wanted to compare "how presidential candidates treated dogs decades ago," the adult Mitt Romney's famous story about strapping his dog Seamus to the roof of the car for a family trip didn't look so bad.

In preemptive response to what some people might think about this comparison, Treacher explained, "Hey, whatever you have to tell yourself, libs. Say what you want about Romney, but at least he only put a dog on the roof of his car, not the roof of his mouth. And whenever you bring up the one, we're going to bring up the other. It's no fun when we push back, is it? That's why it's so much fun."

Some of the brethren took the topic completely seriously, which was about as funny as it got. For example, Warner Todd Huston: "If these liars on the left really cared about dogs like they claim they do," said Huston, "they'd be even more upset at Obama than they would at Romney. But they aren't. This whole episode proves that they don't give a damn about dogs. They only care about finding a political attack against Romney. The welfare of dogs is of no interest to them. Democrats and all their little minions are partisan liars through and through." (Presumably liberals care instead about cats, because, like liberals, cats are treacherous and react with obvious disdain when Warner Todd Huston barks at them.)

And at Pajamas Media, David P. Goldman went for historical perspective: Obama's mother "was not only a Communist fellow-traveler," he wrote, "but the sort of 1960s woman who (as we used to say) 'put her body on the line,' first by marrying two Third World men, and then by spending her career in the Third World." Thus, while "people in some Third World countries eat dog meat because they are poor," Obama ate it only because his race-mixing commie mommy wanted him to hate America. "It really isn't unfair at all to bring Obama's canine consumption to public attention," Goldman said. "The president isn't really one of us. He's a dog-eater." Plus, you heard about his mother, right? Two Third World men!

But for most rightbloggers, Obama-eats-dogs became for official purposes a joke, in which they took an almost hysterical delight.

"Had a few people try and tell me the Romney thing was horrible but Obama dog-eating is nothing," said Never Yet Melted. "My response: nomnomnom." "Doh! Has PETA heard about this?" quipped Nice Deb. "Dogs Are For Petting," said Ace of Spades. "Not for appetizers."

obdog.jpg
Stop us if you've heard this one.
"I'm surprised, actually," said Hot Air's Allahpundit, "that there hasn't been more fake outrage ginned up by liberals to try to spoil the fun righties have been having with this meme." What would have been the point? The brethren were unstoppable, and some even fleshed out their gags with dialogue. For example:

Manhattan Infidel pretended to interview White House dog Bo: "Adorable?," Bo said. "Adorable? I was running for my life. This was the first time I met him and he says to me, 'Bo, you look delicious. I'm going to make you a Chicago style dog.' What the hell is that man? What the hell is that?"

I Own The World had the same idea, but took it further: His Bo revealed that Obama wasn't allowed in his wife's bedroom. "It started because Barack would blame 'certain smells' on me all the time," said Bo. "So I was banished. Without me around his cover was blown. Two nights later he was thrown out. Funny thing though. The room still stinks. It smells like a cab driver wiped his ass on his turban." (The author's nom de plume is BigFurHat, which we suspect is an alias for David P. Goldman.)

This item was linked by rightblogger kingpin Glenn Reynolds of Instapundit, who dished out no fewer than two dozen posts of his own either directly about the subject or devolving to it. Some examples: "'Dinner with Barack' now includes George Clooney. As long as it doesn't include Benjy or Beethoven." "Reader Mary Kline emails to suggest a new SNL sketch about the 'Basset-o-Matic.' Punchline: 'Mmmm, that's terrific Basset!' I'm getting hungry already." "21ST CENTURY RELATIONSHIPS: No, I will not sleep with your dog. Hey, so long as you don't cook and eat it." "The scary part is at the end, when Bo discovers that To Serve Dogs is a . . . cookbook!... Heh. This just keeps getting funnier."

Reynolds persisted with these well into the weekend ("Say, remember back when Obama was complaining that 'They talk about me like a dog?' Maybe he just didn't want to be dinner").

The joke quickly advanced to the first ranks of conservative satirists. Frank J. of IMAO, a famous rightwing wit approved by no less than Jonah Goldberg, weighed in:

"Obama ate a dog. Obama said people talk to him like he's a dog. Well, you are what you eat. Maybe I'm overreacting, but I'm pretty afraid of what will happen when Obama meets with my representative Raul Labrador. You can disagree with Romney's transportation method, but his dog always arrived at the destination alive and uneaten. Quiet! You're all making baby Obama cry!" Well, they can't all be Evelyn Waugh.


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1004 comments
Markmac43
Markmac43

Hey I'm new to this site and I just found out Jim Treacher (whose real name may be Sean) has sex with dogs.  Fucking gross!

Radioredrafts
Radioredrafts

.......you know, it's interesting that they're now going to put Romney on the same level as a TEN-YEAR-OLD, but personally, I think that could backfire on them. ^^ I know I wouldn't do that. :)

Sakara
Sakara

obama is now a loser to be ridiculed!

the leftist media would love to censor all the obama jokes.

if obama is re-elected, he'll show the linda lovelace movie at the white house, since she also had her sick way with a dog?

lindsey lohen to even visit the white house---she was origonally to star in the lovelace dog movie.

Gakfire
Gakfire

Theories abound on how Edroso was hatched. Some say he somersaulted out of Cass Sunstein's vagina. Others contend he's the result of a controversial government program, where shit was stacked 5 feet high and taught to write.

drowningpuppies
drowningpuppies

Pizza Hut, may I help you?

Yeah, I'd like to order a pizza.

What would you like on it?

Uh, mushrooms, uh, cheese, uh,............... and extra pupperoni.

And where would you like that delivered?

Uh, 1300 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Will that be cash or charge?

Uh, charge it to the US taxpayers.

Scott Fraser
Scott Fraser

WAITAMINUTE!!!!! i thought bill ayers ghost-wrote obamas bio... so, he made up the part about eating dog? or did obama write it himself? which one is it treacher?

also, obama, dogs, eating them, etc.(just getting that out of the way for you jim.)

Jack Samback
Jack Samback

Here's another problem: You sort of have to choose between the "Obama eats dogs" and "Obama became a Muslim and went to a madrasah, not to a regular Indonesian public school". Because some Indonesians do eat dog meat, but not the Muslim ones. So you really have to choose which half-understood, mostly wrong, and acontextual bit of nonsense you want to use to attack the character of a six year old.

brantl
brantl

D-bags will be d-bags. There isn't any way around it.

Dark Avenger
Dark Avenger

You try staying up for 2 days and writing virtually the same comment.

It isn't as easy as you think it is.

coozledad
coozledad

Althouse is probably starting to regret her association with Treacher as much as she does marrying <del>Corky St.Clair</del> Meade.

JimTreacher
JimTreacher

I heard Romney eats dogs. No, wait, the other guy.

ihavemultitudes
ihavemultitudes

Frankly, I don't mind if the rubes get their kicks out of Obama's childhood chihuahua chomping. Let them have their little shiny meme. Certainly, those on the other side of the ideological spectrum wouldn't pass up something like this. If it ever came to light that Mitt Romney used to smear peanut butter on his taint and let his beloved childhood schnauzer lick it off, would there be any doubt that  more than a few jokes would have been made by liberals at Willard's expense? Of course not. Who among us hasn't quipped about the supposed magical properties of Mitt Romney's underpants? I didn't think so.

What annoys me, however - though I can't say that I'm surprised - is how cringe-inducing-ly unfunny these people are. A kindergartener with Asperger's syndrome could come up with better jokes than the ones cited above. I'm trying desperately to understand how the bulldog pic is supposed to be funny. Is it the bloated bulldog? The poorly photoshopped trucker hat? Is "tastes like chicken" supposed to induce giggles in any context? Did its creator intend us to laugh at the picture's deliberate kitsch and corniness, like we may at a velvet painting of Elvis? The way in which conservatives have tried and failed to exploit the conspicuous humor in this autobiographical anecdote is yet more proof that, as a group, conservatives just are not funny. They were served up a gentle, slow-motion lob and all they could muster were a bunch of ineffectual swats that fell flat.

el_polacko
el_polacko

obama eats dogs ?!  was that when he was 'growing up in kansas' or hawai'i ?  i thought spam was the big dish in hawai'i...is spam made from DOG ?!  gross....what kind of an american eats dog ??poor bo.

Jean-Paul Bondy
Jean-Paul Bondy

Jim Treachers dog Willie died. Knowing who the owner is, I'm certain it was suicide.

Glenn
Glenn

912? Hilarious!

Hootyman
Hootyman

> No such thing as "liberal media." It's a made-up label. In fact, the media is lazy and corrupt, not liberal.

LOL - look up the last time the NYT endorsed a "non-liberal" presidential candidate; and you say lazy and corrupt but not liberal like they are somehow mutually exclusive.

Ohh.. and ofcourse... OBAMA EATS DOGS!

M. Krebs
M. Krebs

Jim? Jim Treacher? Arthur Treacher? Arthur Treacher's Fish and Chips?

You can't give up now, for fuck's sake! Show some intestinal fortitude!

M. Krebs
M. Krebs

Hey, Treacher! (a k a Sean Medlock)

You say Obama eats dog? That's interesting, innit? Because YOMAMA eats dog.

Please don't tell us you can't keep this up indefinitely.

jim
jim

Commenting in epic comment thread!

Always heartwarming to see an oldschool batshit-insane troll strenuously exercising their Freedom Of Screech.

Proof that a headcase gets halfway around the world (IN THEIR MIND) before all us poor naive benighted marble-surplus-afllicted buggers can even so much as get our socks on. Bless the verbose ones for telegraphing their bugfuck insanity - for only by their leavings shall we know to stay wary & clear of their entire sorry psychopathic lot.

Yeah, the "scandal" that Obama ate dogmeat overseas as a kid sure would be devastating ... if Obama was still only 12 ... or if it was 1930. Sadly for wingnuts, it's 2012 instead: global travel has been ubiquitous for decades, so an awful lot of people have eaten an amazing range of grub while on vacation by now: snakes, dogs, cats, bugs, larvae, mud ... heck, someone's probably marketing EXTREEME QUIZEEN tours with exactly that esoteric/BLECCCHHH menu in mind, & doing swell.

But none of that matters!!!!!!! Treacher will outscreech you ALL & that will prove that whatever cultural barrel-bottom residue it is that he's opted to go Full Metal Dramawhore over THIS time is both profounder & much more important than your faggy community improvements, human rights & social progress! Also, it is a FACT that no, he does NOT have to get back in the hugbox, OR take his meds either! His handler even said so herself - ergo, neener neener neener.

Q 2 tha E 2 tha muthafuggin' DEE, libtards!

coozledad
coozledad

You learn something new every day. Lindsey Lohan has been reduced to appearing in films as a piece of carefully folded paper!  Must be part of her probation agreement.Forgive me. I was trying without success to interpret your word salad.

Sheesh folks, just take the damn meds.

GeoX
GeoX

No no, we're all encouraging you to keep up the dog-related jokes (well...vaguely joke-ish things).    We like the way you're so hell-bent on showing the world how rock-stupid you are.

Strelnikov
Strelnikov

A bird shit on a rock, and Gakfire crawled out of the shit.

Dark Avenger
Dark Avenger

 Some people say that he's just trying to be fair and balanced.

gocart mozart
gocart mozart

Oddly, 1300 Penslyvania Ave is the Ronald Reagan Building.  No joke.

Tracy Mohr
Tracy Mohr

Here's a tip when attempting humor directed at the President - get his address right.

GeoX
GeoX

 You would think, but given that they're capable of simultaneously believing that Obama is a wimp who's always kowtowing to Our Enemies™ AND a blood-soaked, murderous, Stalinist dictator who will stop at NOTHING to force us to have healthcare, this shouldn't present a problem for them!

Tracy Mohr
Tracy Mohr

Jim hasn't been by for five hours. Perhaps Tucker finally discovered how he's been spending his time and took away his access.

Robert Kauss
Robert Kauss

When you've had Tucker Carlson in your mouth, every problem looks like a Snausage.

Daphne
Daphne

 ah, the infantile excrement spreader just couldn't resist. He tried to stay away today but he finds himself compelled to flip the conversation back. Even he knows it won't work, though, and will soon disappear entirely to dump his manure elsewhere.

GeoX
GeoX

You don't understand things very well, do you?

jim
jim

C'mon, Jim! What, I don't even rate a single solitary "Obama eats dogs" over here?After all that arduous typing???

*cries*

toaster pastry
toaster pastry

this post is so utterly full of win. where would you like your internets delivered?

Daphne
Daphne

 The second-stringers are a real hoot. And no doubt late to the game deliberately since even they know how stupid their desperation is.

Gakfire
Gakfire

 You fell out of your mothers ass mouth first onto some guys cock.

GeoX
GeoX

Yeah, but I think the more fundamental problem is that he forgot to include a joke in his joke.

Damon Poeter
Damon Poeter

There are entire cultures of dog-eaters who could figure out how to write an automated script that populates comment threads with 'Obama eats dogs' in less time than it would take to poach a pooch ... Jim's laborious cut-and-paste approach is positively barking mad

Hootyman
Hootyman

What is it that am I not understanding by pointing out that the NYT has not endorsed a Republican presidential candidate in over 60 years and that LONG streak of liberal endorsements by such a media stalwart may in fact show a glimmer of media bias?

Newsflash.... in 2012, the NYT will endorse the presidential candidate who EATS DOG (and keep their streak alive).

GeoX
GeoX

I'm not gonna claim I understand your obsession with gay sex, but hey, to each his own, man. 

Just out of curiosity, do you KNOW how stupid and insane you are?  Or is it more like being a fish in water?  And do you actually imagining that spewing incoherent filth all over the place serves you or whatever causes you have in any way?  I'm just really interested cases of abnormal psychology like yours.

Gakfire
Gakfire

 Go suck the paste out of your boyfriends beanshooter.

GeoX
GeoX

 Yup, that's the kind of sub-literate gibbering we expect from you wingnuts.

Daphne
Daphne

 slanted coverage of the candidates in the so-called straight news section, slanted coverage of the issues...just for starters.

GeoX
GeoX

 Well, just for starters, you have no goddamn clue what "liberal" means.

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