The 12 Months of Crazy: Rightbloggers' Greatest Hits of 2012

June: Supreme Court upholds Obamacare

The brethren's butthurt was palpable on this one. At National Review Avik Roy claimed Chief Justice Roberts, hungry for the approbation of the New York Times, had been "blackmailed by left-wing editorialists." When Paul Krugman approved the decision, Timothy P. Carney tweeted, "Krugman talks of a more decent society... by the end you suspect he means one where all conservatives are killed."

They did see a silver lining, though: Daniel Fisher of Forbes thought the decision was "likely to be a boon for presidential hopeful Mitt Romney, who can now campaign even more vigorously on a platform of repealing the unpopular law..." "So far, it's good news for Mitt Romney," said Ed Morrissey of Hot Air. "Thursday's USSC decision upholding ObamaCare's individual mandate as constitutional has served one positive purpose," said Edward Daley at Renew America, "which is to practically guarantee Barack Obama's defeat in November."

July: Aurora, the other gun massacre that meant don't do anything about guns ever

The shooting of 70 people in Colorado set up a wet run for rightblogger reactions to the Newtown shooting, with pretty much exactly the same themes: For example, Jeff Goldstein of Protein Wisdom accused gun control advocates of (what else) only caring about "how can [they] use this tragedy politically," and offered his own preventive measure: "law abiding citizens with revolvers or semi-auto... Stock up on guns and ammo. And do not let them get away with the kind of post-Columbine crackdown on the Second Amendment they're most certainly already planning to angle for." So far his plan seems to have worked.

August: The battle of Chick-fil-A

Rightbloggers rejoiced that ordinary citizens -- in what numbers, no one was able to say -- went to Chick-fil-A one day solely to show support for the chain's opposition to gay marriage. It was a giddy time: Jesus blogger Mollie Hemingway of Get Religion bragged that she might have gotten a guy fired for making anti-protesters comments on Facebook, which is what strong popular movements do, right? That'll teach him to claim an anti-gay protest was about "hatred"!

Later the brethren tried something similar on behalf of Papa John's anti-Obamacare pseudopizza chain. 2012 will go down in history as the year cramming one's maw with crap fast food became the Tea Party's favorite protest mode. Now patriots will have a new crop of health-related reasons to use Medicare-funded mobility scooters.

September: Benghazi, the game changer that wasn't

"CHAOS AT THE STATE DEPT?" "Team Obama Tweets While America's Embassies Burn," etc. -- yes, this at last was the scandal that would rip the scales from America's eyes and defenestrate Obama. Unfortunately no one gives a shit about Benghazi, even after the strenuous efforts of the latter-day Woodwards and Bernsteins of Breitbart.com.

They bitch about it to this day. Last week Allen West said absent Secretary of Stater Hillary Clinton had "come down with a case of Benghazi flu." This is the sort of talk that has made the West the Republican Party success story he is -- and, come to think of it, has done the same for the Republican Party itself.

obamakillsyou.jpg
Where do they run these cartoons, anyway? Are they even printed, or just hung on bulletin boards at klaverns?
October: Unskewed polls show Romney rout

Nate Silver? Just some fag who doesn't know what he's talking about -- this election's in the bag! And if you won't take whatshisname's word for it, you know you can trust Dick Morris.

November: Oops

When things didn't go so well for them on Election Day, rightbloggers developed a new plan for the Republican Party: They should treat the newly powerful Hispanic voters as potential foreign enemies; speak out on black oppression of whites, and -- as if that weren't outreach enough -- tell women that Obama's their real enemy because he tried to make that token Susan Rice Secretary of State, and then was chauvinistic enough to defend her. Electoral gold!

December: More of the same

We got another terrible gun massacre, and even more ridiculous excuses from rightbloggers. When NRA prez Wayne LaPierre made his counterproposal to the gun control everyone now seemed to want -- armed guards in every school in America -- even Rupert Murdoch's New York Post momentarily debarked the crazy train. But most rightbloggers stood their ground, so to speak, telling us that the real problem wasn't LaPierre's detachment from reality, but the liberal media.

Daniel Halper explained at the Weekly Standard that some TV talking head who was mean to LaPierre has a kid who goes to school with Obama's kids, so they probably have Secret Service protection, so the talking head is a hypocrite. At Instapundit, Glenn Reynolds said reporters' antipathy to guns had "a race/class angle," by which we assume he meant that the liberal media was directing blacks on behalf of Obama to steal everyone's guns so they can bring back Reconstruction.

Long before Ann Althouse denounced Andrew Sullivan as a hypocrite for "boasting that his 'Enough!' post 'has just blown up on Facebook" because "he's so sensitive about those terrible guns, but his metaphor of choice is explosion," it was clear that most of them had given up arguing entirely and were just trying to create a distraction.

To sum up, these guys had major clues dropped on them throughout 2012, yet they show no sign of changing -- even though the world around them is. But look on the bright side: Who doesn't love a fish-out-of-water comedy? Happy 2013, readers, and don't worry, we'll never run out of material.

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14 comments
RIGHTTURN
RIGHTTURN

Why is  rightwing conservative  policies like keeping the Bush era tax cuts for people making $250K or less crazy. Reverting the higher tax rate for people making upwards of $250K at a tax rate of 29%. Why is it crazy that the national budget across the board needs to be cut including Defense and Welfare/Medicare/Medicaid. We can't afford it. America has a $15Trillion National debt. We are already bankrupt with unfunded liabilities totaling $100Trillion+ in liabilities. Why is it crazy to repatriate corporate profits back to America instead of tax accounting loopholes and incorporations overseases via tax havens. Reform the tax code. Tax the corporations at 15%. It is better than current situation where corporations in foreign domicle incorporations pay 2% like in Ireland and Bermuda. I.E Google has $15 Billion in corporate earnings parked oversease. Apple has $12 Billion in corporate earning parked overseas. Why is the Republican Party demonized as evil. Why was Mitt Rommney evil. 

editor92
editor92

Mazel tov, man. If Jonas Salk were alive today, he would insist on injecting you into the national discourse. Be well ...

keta
keta

Watching the implosion of the GOP has been the best free entertainment, ever! Thanks for the recap to a fantastic year, and here's hoping the clown show never ends (which it won't, because the clowns keep piling out of that little tiny car.)

RogerAiles
RogerAiles

"To sum uop, these guys had major clues dropped on them ihroughout 2012, yet they show no sign of changing...."

Celebrating Christmas with Crapo, Roy?

Cheres!


GlockH.PalinEsq.
GlockH.PalinEsq.

Happy Atheistic Winter Celebratory Period to all of my fellow godless commie pinkos out there in liberal land! I hope you are all enjoying the gifts Obama gave you in exchange for voting to turn America into the United Socialist Caliphate of Aztlan. I know I am! (Legal pot and all the gay abortions I can have-how did he know?)

McSalmon
McSalmon

@RIGHTTURN
The Republican wish to erase the debt is a snow job - they raised a massive deficit when they declared a pair of warswithout seeking funding, expanded federal power, while reducing taxes. That happened, and no one on the right said 'boo'. Now that we've got the advantage, they have pulled out every stop to prevent us from addressing the mess they made. Reducing government spending in the midst of a recession and recovery is pure madness. There is no incentive for a corporation not paying taxes now because it's offshored it's money to bring it back to America because the taxes are lower than usual. Why would they agree to pay something instead of nothing if they didn't have to? And anyone believing that the GOP is interested in cutting Defense for the sake of the Budget is a fool, and I point as proof the walk back from the automatic defense cuts baked into the earlier negotiations on the debt ceiling - a deal hammered out because the GOP simply wanted to throw a monkey wrench into the Obama administration.  I say the GOP is 'evil' because at the end of the day, they simply don't care about this nation, full stop. Every time I see a post by some guy asking to secede because Obama won, every time I see another declaration to 'go Galt', every man who declares that he doesn't need no government to teach science to his kids, every voice added to the clamor to evict the UN, and kick all the Muslims out of the US, and build a gigantic wall across Mexico, I know that that the movement is captured by lunatics who want to live in a world where their spite is unchallenged.

royedroso
royedroso

@RogerAiles you read all the way to the end? Good man! Thanks and Merry Christmas.

edroso
edroso

@publicaddress Thank you! Merry Christmas!

RightTurn
RightTurn

@McSalmon Well if you think everything is a "snow job" and a lie. then America is definitely Fucked.  The U.S is paralyzed legislatively. 

America has to support Israel and increase foreign aid. The Muslims are the clear and present enemy and will  destroy the Western World. 70% of Latinos are on welfare. They just walk across the Rio Grande. U.S. national security is seriously endangered by the violation of our national sovreign borders.

Obama clearly did not win by a large mandate. He won by 1.2 million via the popular vote tally.

U.S Keynesian quantitative easing has reduced the purchasing power of the U.S dollar by 45% since 1985. - World Economic Council/OECD


Gakfire
Gakfire

@edroso - Eat a shit-sausage out of Whoopie's ass, you commie cocksucker !

vacuumslayer
vacuumslayer

@edroso Jesus Christ. We're never going to win the War on Christmas if you keep doing shit like this.

McSalmon
McSalmon

@RightTurn @McSalmon And what is the cause of this paralysis, RT? Turns out, it's the GOP, refusing to pass routine legislation whether or not it's going to cause harm to the country. The Republicans are absolutely schizophrenic on any topic, but if it looks like it will help the Democrats, they are agin it. 'Spread democracy everywhere, unless they want to vote  someone we don't like!' 'Eliminate waste from government spending, but don't you dare touch the defense budget!' 'Keep the borders secure, but don't let the TSA touch my junk!' 'Latinos are on welfare, but I deserve my federal assistance!'


It all boils down to this: The Republican platform has two rules. 1) The government should be run for the benefit of a small minority of well off white men, to a lesser extent people who support the first group, and as little as possible everyone else. 2) Democrats are not worthy of power. That's it. Look at the comment about how many votes Obama got, and ask yourself how many Bush got in 2000. He got more EVs than many of our past presidents, and larger chunks of the popular vote as well, but he doesnt have a mandate? This nation may be fucked, but it's for different reasons than you think.

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