New Year's Eve in New York: A Survival Guide

Times_Square_MAM.jpeg
This should be your nightmare.


New York, New York. The name luxuriously repeated by Frank Sinatra and later rejuvenated by Jay-Z evokes images of the city's guilty nightlife, where everyone who hustled and bustled all day finally let their vices loose. It's the lifeblood of our weekends in this hedonist metropolis, when bars, clubs or wherever it is you found yourself at 2am on a Friday are lined with partygoers, all looking for the right scene to drink the night away in.


However, there are several nights when this lifeblood can go bad; those select few days of the year when New York's nightlife turns against you. These are the times when a subset of hours in a day are strictly dedicated to partying, leading to mass confusion and hysteria. To name a few: Halloween, St. Patrick's Day, SantaCon and, most notably and timely, New Year's Eve.

The last day of the year rises above the rest for one sole reason: exposure. It's seriously the one night when all of the country is watching New York; at midnight, millions of eyes are set on that damn ball in Times Square. As a result, thousands upon thousands of people flock to the streets to ring in the new year and we'll have to deal with the repercussions. This isn't meant to sound nativist but, shit, you'll need to know what you're getting into.

Luckily, you have these tips to make it out alive.


DO: Avoid all modes of public transportation from 6pm on. We're talking cabs, subways, buses, gondolas and ferries here. They'll be more packed than those subways in Japan and will only slow you down. Therefore, you'll have to walk everywhere (for the ladies: heels... probably not the best idea). If it's blistering cold out, suck it up; you made the decision to come to New York on New Year's and these are the consequences. Unless you want to end up dealing with these guys on every street corner in Manhattan:


DON'T: Go anywhere near Times Square. Better yet, here are your parameters: maintain a steady bomb radius from the area between 23rd Street and 59th Street. Basically, if you go to Midtown, Murray Hill or any other neighborhood with a Sbarro's, you'll have the worst night ever. You'll either get trampled or drown in confetti. Whatever is quicker. 

DO: Stay in one place or one borough. Without any form of transportation (see above), your bar hopping will have to be limited and localized. Unless a life-threatening electrical fire breaks out in the bar that you're at, stay put. If your friends are in Chelsea and you're in the East Village, you'll see them next year. And don't even think 'Can you bring me back to Williamsburg?' is a viable card in your night's deck.

DON'T: Make plans past midnight. It's a free for all at that point.

DO: Go to a friend's apartment if that option is available. And thank your friend a million times over for sparing you a roller coaster of emotions by helping him or her clean the next morning. Believe me, they'll be grateful.

DON'T: Sleep outside. On any given night, this is a bad idea. Tonight, it's the worst idea.

DO: See a concert of some sort if you can. Every musician and their mother plays a show in New York on this special night (high recommendation: Jay-Z and Coldplay at Barclays). You may have to shovel out an arm and the next three month's rent for a ticket but, hey, you'll be entertained for hours with no knowledge whatsoever of What's Going On Outside. Decide for yourself if it's worth it.

DON'T: Wear white at all. It's after Labor Day - don't try to pass it off as "winter white." Save it for summer; we get it.

DO: Make a fool out of yourself. It's New Years Eve - enjoy the guise of hype while it lasts. Hopefully, you didn't read this guide to yourself using an anti-fun tone in your head. New York is party central on this particular evening for a reason. But, like any major event here, the night has its pros and its cons that you'll have to maneuver through. And reading this guide is Step One.

DON'T: Ignore these tips or you'll pay for it. I won't tell you how but you'll find out the hard way.

New York, New York. FYI: Extra points go to the person who makes it to sunrise/brunch.

[jsurico15@gmail.com/@JSuricz]


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33 comments
karenkho
karenkho

@ploriggio Does this means I shouldn't rely on cabs to and from my party?

ritamoraruk
ritamoraruk

@swamimammy @villagevoice Thank you hun just what I need! xx

shottab80
shottab80

@VoiceStreet For #newyears #2013 #celebration Shoot Blanks #savelives

DubaiWriter
DubaiWriter

@tomgara How are you finding my favourite city?

Hunter.k.Slutsky
Hunter.k.Slutsky

Get 3 bottles of Civas Regal and a couple lines of Coke and celebrate at Avenue. Took home 2 fine models and Fuck them all night. Drink and be Merry - bring in the New Year. 

w_fisher
w_fisher

@MTragenuggets I'm convinced you wrote the intro to this RT @villagevoice New Year's Eve In New York: A Survival Guide http://t.co/RaXXiU7V

ploriggio
ploriggio

@karenkho Just don't count on one on the way home, regardless of time and location.

ploriggio
ploriggio

@karenkho Only if you're heading out after 10 and your party is in the core. (We don't party as early as NYC here.) Otherwise, cab away.

karenkho
karenkho

@ploriggio Even in the Junction?

Uber_TOR
Uber_TOR

@_CJWalker demand will be heavy but we're working our hardest to ensure you'll be able to get a ride! #ubernye

ryangraves
ryangraves

@_CJWalker definitely. that's what happens with fixed prices. Uber BLACK will be there for ya though. /@Uber_TOR

_CJWalker
_CJWalker

@Uber_TOR Ah my bad. So are you anticipating availability shortages with the TAXIs?

Uber_TOR
Uber_TOR

@_CJWalker @karenkho @boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans Keep in mind, Uber surge pricing does not apply to TAXI fares! Hit us up with any q's!

boyreporter
boyreporter

@karenkho yes. See you at @thismason's party

karenkho
karenkho

@boyreporter I have no idea what it'll be like at @thismason's but I'm hoping for the best. See you there?

LadySnarksalot
LadySnarksalot

@_CJWalker @karenkho @boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans best bet to score a cab in Toronto may be with Hailo app. And it's normal cab price

boyreporter
boyreporter

@karenkho If you're in a roomful of people you like then I think you're having a good new years... that's kinda all I expect.

ploriggio
ploriggio

@karenkho @_CJWalker @boyreporter @p_evans @thismason Then you're golden. Have fun!

karenkho
karenkho

@_CJWalker @boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans I already made cookies, bought the wine and found a place to stay. @thismason's should be great.

_CJWalker
_CJWalker

@karenkho @boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans Easy solution: stay at home! #howthecoolkidsdoit

karenkho
karenkho

@_CJWalker @boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans I will probably pack extra layers and just walk.

_CJWalker
_CJWalker

@karenkho @boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans if you use Uber you should be able to get one, you'll just be subject to their surge pricing.

thismason
thismason

@karenkho @p_evans @ploriggio Always.

karenkho
karenkho

@p_evans @ploriggio @thismason It's also a good idea to bring wine, right?

karenkho
karenkho

@boyreporter @ploriggio @p_evans I booked a place to stay about 20 minutes from the party. Might be easier to walk instead of waiting.

ploriggio
ploriggio

@boyreporter @p_evans @karenkho I'm sticking to a five-block radius of my apartment this year. And wearing flats.

p_evans
p_evans

@ploriggio @karenkho i recall walking from @thismason's at around 3, for what it's worth.

boyreporter
boyreporter

@ploriggio @p_evans @karenkho I got a cab from the Junction last year... wasn't easy but it's possible. Just don't count on it.

ploriggio
ploriggio

@p_evans @karenkho I'd say even later. I had some serious competition trying to hail one last year around 4.

karenkho
karenkho

@p_evans @ploriggio TTC bus it is.

ploriggio
ploriggio

@karenkho Maybe call but hailing will be tough. Not many cabs there to begin with. Waited 45 min last year in Bloordale which is + central.

p_evans
p_evans

@karenkho @ploriggio oh there's no way you're getting a cab tonight. Between 9 pm and 2 am I'd forget about it.

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