Should Anthony Weiner Be Comptroller?

Anthonyweiner.jpeg
United States Congress
Today the Post reported that disgraced former Congressman Anthony Weiner was considering a run for the city comptroller's office. According to several anonymous-yet-well-connected Manhattanites, pollsters are calling around to suss out the levels of support Weiner might receive if he decided to run.

What's a comptroller, you ask? It's the person who tells the mayor and city council how they ought to spend money. Should Weiner be one? We've weighed the pros and cons, but we're still on the fence.

Con: boxer-briefs.

Pro: His scandal generated the most hilarious scandal name in history: Weiner-gate.

Con: He claimed not to be able to recognize his own... you know. (Spoiler alert: it was his and he knew it.)

Pro: He's a horrible liar, which might make him a more transparent, reliable politician.

Pro: He has an exceptionally impressive jawline. He could slice bagels with that thing.

Con: No one wants to work for him, and the comptroller's office employs over 700 people. In 2008, the Times reported that he's a nasty boss who ekes out long hours from his staff while shouting at them and kicking chairs.

Pro: He's a lifetime New York resident, so he must know the city pretty well at this point.

Con: He's friends with Ben Affleck, who seems like kind of a bummer and gave us heart palpitations with his new movie, Argo.

Pro: He's friends with Jon Stewart. We like Jon Stewart.

Con: Right-wingers think his wife, Huma Abedin, is tied to the Muslim Brotherhood.

Pro: His wife works for Hillary Clinton as her chief of staff, and is totally not in the Muslim Brotherhood, according to John McCain and John Boehner.

Con: He tried and failed to run for mayor in 2005.

Pro: He has $3.9 million saved up that was intended for a 2013 mayoral bid, so he can definitely afford a comptroller campaign.

Con: Everybody likes his opponent, Manhattan borough president Scott Stringer, better.

Pro: Stringer only has a measly $2.3 million to blow on his campaign.

Con: Weiner seems kind of racist. When Palestine tried to join the UN in 2006, he said their delegation should "start packing their little Palestinian terrorist bags." And in 1991, when he was gunning for a city council seat, he used a race-baiting tactic that exploited fears about the Crown Heights race riots to upset his competition.

Are you ready to welcome Weiner back from his political exile, or do you want him to stay gone for good? Help us weigh the pros and cons in this important political battle.


Advertisement

My Voice Nation Help
2 comments
studiesincrap
studiesincrap topcommenter

He could slice bagels with that thing = YAY

Marie
Marie

Funny!!! And, no he shouldn't run. Political exile isn't far gone enough.

Now Trending

New York Concert Tickets

From the Vault

 

Loading...