10 Class Title Suggestions for David Petraeus, Who Will Be Teaching at CUNY

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This week, City University of New York announced that it would be bringing on an exciting new staff member: former CIA Director David Petraeus, who has been named "Visiting Professor of Public Policy" and will start in August.

But what exactly will Petraeus be teaching? Public policy is a pretty broad topic. With respect for what Dr. Petraeus has done to serve our country, but also it being a late Wednesday afternoon, the Village Voice editorial team has brainstormed some class title suggestions.

1. "How to Run Six-Minute Miles While Being Interviewed by a Member of the Press"

This is how Paula Broadwell wrote her book.

2. "Cinema Studies: Why Argo and Zero Dark Thirty Are Modern Classics"

Self-explanatory.

3. "TV Studies: The Problem with Homeland"

This course includes a week on strong female characters with serious professional indiscretions.

4. "Controlled Shmoozing: How to Navigate the Tampa Social Scene"

And gain VIP access to "valet parking, string quartets on the lawn, premium cigars and champagne, and caviar-laden buffets." [WaPo]

5. "How to Handle an HBO Show Basically Becoming Your Real Life"

Students will need to take "TV Studies: The Problem with 'Homeland'" as a prerequisite.

6. "Advanced Seminar: No, I Will Not Help You with Your Dissertation on Afghanistan"

Seriously. Just use the Internet.

7. "Situational Awareness 101: Beware Shirtless FBI Agents"

Remember all the weird media hype surrounding this guy?

8. "Tiger Woods: All Things Considered, Not That Bad a Guy"

Though Iraq was a lot harder than the Masters.

9. "How to Make Everyone Everywhere Want Your Surge"

Though, beware: Surges don't usually end well.

10. "Emerging Domestic Threats in America: Bored Florida Socialites"

Don't underestimate Floridians. Really.


[@sydbrownstone][sbrownstone@villagevoice.com]


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