A Long Island Man Ran a Kidney Donation Scam Out of His Mom's House

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Photo Credit: scribbletaylor via Compfight cc
For every person trying to save a loved one, there's one huckster trying to make a buck off that desperation. On Monday morning, the New York Attorney General's Office announced closure of Nephrologica, Inc., a "company" that charged clients exorbitant fees to procure kidney donations. Owner and CEO Michael Goldstein is required to issue refunds to all of his victims and shut down the business he was running out of a house he shares with his mother in Nassau County.

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Police Catch Suspect in the Long Island Jamba Juice Robbery

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Flickr/L.K.
Fear not, Jamba Juice patrons of Long Island. Police have arrested the man suspected in last week's Jamba Juice robbery as well as eight other robberies at gas stations and convenience stores across the island.

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Anthony Hennis, Father of Dead 16-Month-Old Antiq Hennis, Sought In Connection with a 3 Train Robbery

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Facebook/RIP Antiq Hennis
Antiq Hennis, the 16-month-old boy shot and killed in Early September.
Anthony Hennis and his younger brother are being sought by police for robbing passengers at a 3 train stop in Brownsville. Hennis, whose 16-month-old son Antiq Hennis was shot and killed September 1 with a bullet meant for his father, reportedly snatched a watch off a teen's arm on the train with the help of his 20-year-old younger brother Ammany Hennis. You know what they say: the family that gangbangs together, hangs together (right?)

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Flushing Family Charged With Reckless Endangerment for Stocking Their House Full of Asian Tourists

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Google Maps
A hotel on the left, and cigarettes on the right, allegedly.
A Flushing family will no longer be offering an incredibly cheap, incredibly dangerous hotel option for cramped, weary travelers, because they've all been arrested. Quimin He, 55, his wife, Chun Y Tu, 56, and their son, Xioshan He, 34, were charged with second-degree reckless endangerment, after a yearlong investigation found that they'd hacked up their duplex into "a 15-room hotel that catered to Asian tourists," according to the Queens District Attorney's office. Detectives discovered the hotel while investigating reports of illegal cigarettes being sold in the neighborhood. They found those, too, at the next-door neighbor's house. If you were looking for a $60 hotel room and some untaxed, unlabeled smokes, here's the part where you're kicking yourself.

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Robert Whitfield, Rikers Guard on His Way to Prison, Shopped Around For Inmate Willing to Bribe Him

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On Tuesday, Robert Whitfield, a former Rikers prison guard, was handed a lengthy sentence for accepting a bribe from a drug dealer. Whitfield, 51, was arrested in 2011, after an investigation by the New York City Department of Investigation and the DEA's New York Organized Crime Drug Enforcement Strike Force found that he had brokered a deal to take six and a half pounds of cocaine in exchange for promising to help shorten the drug dealer's sentence. But it turns out that Whitfield had been looking around for a while for someone who was willing to bribe him. He was indiscreet about it. One of the inmates he approached promptly went to the authorities, and as a result, has received a shortened prison sentence. That inmate was in prison for possessing large amounts of drugs. Life is funny, isn't it?

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NYPD Narcotics Detectives Busted Up An Alleged Shabbat-Observing Drug Ring

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Image via Google Maps
The Sheepshead Bay apartment building there the ring was allegedly based.
We're not saying that you deal drugs. And you really shouldn't. But in the event that you decide to dabble in the controlled substance arts, it seems important to keep several things in mind. Things like: deal only with people you know. Don't send incriminating mass text messages to your huge customer list, things like "Shop is now opened DOB, Blues, kpins, subs & white girl." Besides being poorly-punctuated, narcotics officers will quickly decode that one, inferring that you have for sale several different varieties of drugs: heroin that you've name-branded "D.O.B.," along with Oxycodone, Klonopin, Suboxone (a prescription drug people usually take to get off opioids) and cocaine.

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Speed Demon Afroduck Arrested For His "Fastest Lap of Manhattan" Video After Claiming He Wouldn't Get Caught

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Just a day after gloating to Jalopnik that he would never be arrested, a man going by "Afroduck" was arrested for speeding around Manhattan at an average speed of 66 miles per hour. Christopher Tang, 30, was nabbed by police last night in connection with the Fastest Lap of Manhattan 2013" video, which showed a driver circling the entire borough in just 24 minutes.

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Caterina Curatolo Scammed New York State out of $87,000 in Sandy Relief Money

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Image via Facebook
If you're looking to get put up in a hotel because your house is a wreck, why not scam the New York state government into the footing the bill? Caterina Curatolo was arrested yesterday for defrauding the state out of $87,000 in Superstorm Sandy relief money. On top of an unnecessary hotel stay, Curatolo spent the money on shoes, clothes, electronics, and checking her credit score, according to the criminal complaint.

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The Man Who Attempted Rape As a Prank Pleads Not Guilty, Because It Was a Joke, Obvi

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Photo Credit: Bjørn Giesenbauer via Compfight cc
There's attempted rape, and then there's attempted rape that's funny, according to one Central Park "prankster." Twenty-one-year-old Saul Alvarez was arraigned Thursday for forcibly dragging a woman in Central Park to the ground in what he describes as a practical joke back in June. Face, meet palm. Over and over and over.

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Man Goes Up to a Roof Expecting a Threesome, Gets Maced, Dies Instead

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Photo Credit: Sean Future via Compfight cc
Protip: If someone offers you sex, but makes coming to a rooftop one of the conditions, make a list of all the bad choices you've made in your life and read it over. Then decide if joining the five-story-high club is something you're serious about.

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