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​Talking to the crazies all day could make you go insane. That's why we're not putting too much blame on William Bannon Jr., a research psychologist at Mount Sinai Hospital. the New York Post has the story of his crazy arrest, which includes driving on the wrong side of the road, driving on the sidewalk, and finally driving with the arresting officer attached to the driver's-side window of the car. The arrest happened on East 62nd Street near First Avenue. It was apparently a crazy early night on the Upper East Side.

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​According to unconfirmed reports, including from the Egyptian daily Al-Masry Al-Youm, ousted Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak, who resigned last week after almost three weeks of violent protests in his country, is in a coma. Other (pro-government) sources say that the 82-year-old former president is in a "severe psychological condition" but not in a coma, while yet another report places him "on death's door in a hospital in Baden, Germany."

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​A quadriplegic man who got stuck on a broken "It's a Small World" ride at Disneyland and had to hear that insufferable music over and over again when Disney failed to evacuate him in a reasonable amount of time is now suing the company. While waiting for help for some 40 minutes as other people were evacuated, the man, Jose Martinez, suffered from a high-blood pressure condition called dysreflexia. As he put it, "It feels like an ice pick going through your temples. The pain was exacerbated "especially when you couple that with the continuous, 'small world' music in the background."

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via Daily Mail

​What was that thing about "portents"? After birds started the trend of showing up dead, fish followed, and now 40,000 velvet or "devil" crabs have washed up on the shores of Britain, reports the Daily Mail. It's thought they died of hypothermia after the coldest December in 120 years in the UK. Which is better than falling out of the sky for no apparent reason, we guess, end-times-wise, but maybe worse than dying because of human frivolity, a/k/a, fireworks. Either way, it doesn't sound...good.

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The MTA's new cash cow

The only thing that's certain about the MTA's Select Bus is that people are being taken for a ride by the setup through which passengers have to buy tickets before boarding. The city has handed out more than $1 million in summonses to riders, so the Select Bus "has increasingly become a cash cow for the money-strapped agency," as the Post puts it.

East Village teacher Michelle O'Neal, a native New Yorker, has a $100 ticket from the MTA cops to prove her own personal frustration. It was stressful enough that O'Neal was trying to go to her oncologist for a biopsy on a recent day. Then she stepped on the M15.

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​The MTA is having a bad time of it. Competing for subway horror story of the week (and it's only Monday), along with the alleged stabber-jumper situation and a potential Chelsea subway rapist, we have Michael Dion, a New York actor, who faced one of our greatest commuter nightmares this weekend. The New York Post published the truly scarring images of his entrapment after falling into the Union Square station track and getting stuck between the moving extending platform and the 4 train itself.

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Ooh -- awkward.

​Creepily, Disney built a town in central Florida, just five miles south of Walt Disney World, 14 years ago. It is called Celebration, Florida, and, you might expect, it has a certain Stepford quality, with "manicured lawns and classic movie theaters." It is also a town where, at holiday season, "Bing Crosby croons from speakers hidden in the foliage." And, in a bid to out-creep the creepy, it has had its first murder. Milestones!

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​Just imagine: You're in the big city from Florida with your dance troupe, about to appear on BET's 106 & Park, if you can just make it from New Jersey to the studio in time...and then there's traffic. A ton of traffic. Freaking traffic. At what point do you decide to get out of your car and run into Manhattan by way of the Lincoln Tunnel?

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Horrors, an unmade bed! (via TMZ)

​As everyone gasps in shock, clucks "how could he?", and professes their most earnest hopes that he gets help while secretly loving the big, drunken, drugged, (allegedly) woman-beating/hooker-seeking/room-trashing mess that is Charlie Sheen, we're going to go out on a limb here and say it. Not so impressive, dude.

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How not to install your air conditioner.

​Here's something we didn't even know we had to worry about: Air conditioners falling out of 6th-floor windows and ricocheting off of awnings and onto the heads of innocent passers-by. Yep. On what will go down in history as a very unlucky day for 67-year-old Tony Franzese, the poor man was just walking his Shih Tzu down 2nd Avenue at 3rd Street when he got bonked on the head with the errant A.C.

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