Racists Declare White Man March a Success, Everyone Else Wonders If It Actually Happened

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Image via White Man March
A White Man March attendee
Well, that escalated quickly.

Last week we broke the story (in the mainstream, non-racist press, anyway) of the White Man March, a flash mob-style demonstration planned for March 15 by Kyle Hunt, a 30-year-old Amherst graduate from a very small town in Massachusetts. The story went viral and was picked up by multiple local and national media outlets. Then, evidently, the WMM happened, although none of us actually saw it.

To be fair, that was Hunt's intention. From the outset, he'd said his goal was to make sure that "outside media" weren't able to cover the event and somehow make him and his fellow "pro-white" activists look foolish.

"If there aren't any opposition forces there, we'll be the ones with all of the media," he explained on a white power podcast. "And we'll select out the pieces of media that make us look the best."

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The White Man March, Which Is Almost Exactly What It Sounds Like, Is Coming to New York

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Image via White Man March
Kyle Hunt
This coming Saturday, March 15, in a bunch of cities worldwide, disgruntled white supremacists will take to the streets, bearing banners that read "DIVERSITY" = WHITE GENOCIDE in very big red letters. The White Man March aims to be a large display of "coordinated pro-white activity," timed to coincide with St. Patrick's Day and meant to express these white folks' displeasure with how "white countries" are being over-run with, you know, non-whites and Jews and such.

There's only one hitch. The organizer of the White Man March is Kyle Hunt, a 30-year-old guy who hails from a very small town in Massachusetts, near Cape Cod. Hunt understands that in the United States, white nationalists don't really have the numbers to pull off an impressive-looking march. Past white supremacist protests have ended up, in his words, "looking like a circus." He's also fearful that the police or "anti-fascist" protesters might show up to try to disrupt the WMM festivities. So in New York and other big U.S. cities, the White Man Marchers are planning a very quiet flash mob, which they hope none of us will hear about ahead of time.

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"Homo Demons" Pastor James David Manning Says Obama Ordered Everybody To Start Ignoring Him Again

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Image via Facebook
Pastor Manning.
Last week, we heard from Harlem pastor James David Manning, who put a rather controversial sign in front of his ATLAH World Missionary Church declaring that President Obama had "released the homo demons on the black man." He follow that up with a videotaped sermon, delivered through his website, that expounded on the dangers of the Obama-controlled "white homosexual man," who has been loosed on the black community, especially black women. The white homosexual male's special weapons are demonry, of course, as well as their enjoyment of the theater.

It was a pretty spectacular display of nutballery, and ATLAH's sign went viral. A whole lot of news outlets covered it, and then, just as quickly, everybody was done covering it. Some might argue that's just the nature of a one-day, novelty news story about a wacky guy. But Pastor James David Manning, homo demon hunter, knows the real reason nobody's writing about him anymore: Barack Obama.

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Harlem Pastor James David Manning Very Upset About Obama-Controlled "Homo Demons"

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Image via ATLAH's Facebook page.
The sign in front of ATLAH this week.
If you're not familiar with James David Manning, the pastor of ATLAH World Church at Lenox and 123rd in Harlem, his latest video, released through his website yesterday, will serve as a pretty good overview for his particular and rather eccentric brand of old-time religion. The video begins with Pastor Manning speaking about the "catastrophic crisis of the absence of males in the home" in the African-American community, adding, "Black women are having a hard time finding black men to marry."

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New York's Premier Bro State Senator Greg Ball Plagiarizes, Gets Busted, DGAF About It

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Listen, nerds: Greg Ball doesn't care about your plagiarism allegations.
When we last checked in with upstate-dwelling State Senator Greg Ball, he was making virulently anti-immigrant statements to score some cheap political points. Now, just as cheaply, he's playing to the other side of the house, sponsoring a bill to ban killer whales from New York's water parks and aquariums, as the Albany Times-Union reports. Ball dubbed it the "Blackfish" bill, and the Times-Union points out it's "largely symbolic," given that there aren't any killer whales in New York at the moment and we're not exactly a bastion of marine mammal entertainment. Still, at least Ball isn't anti-immigrant and pro-whale torture, right? That'd be an unfortunate combination.

But the Times-Union noticed a more interesting piece of Ball's bill, namely the part that his office plagiarized outright from a 17-year-old kid. Donald Julius Rapier, a junior at Lindblow Math & Science Academy, wrote this op-ed for the Huffington Post in January. Ball's staff was apparently quite taken with one passage, which appears verbatim in the bill.

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Donald Trump's Fake Gubernatorial Campaign Will Soon Have a Fake Exploratory Committee

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Future president or governor or whatever.
Famous orange-American Donald Trump has had a busy few months, feuding with State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, pretending to be friends with recently deceased civil rights icon Nelson Mandela, and fulminating on Twitter about how climate change isn't real because it's cold outside during winter. But he's still found time for one of this favorite hobbies: pretending to run for office.

Every so often for the past 25 years or so, perhaps whenever his ratings start to sag or his hideous tie collection is selling less briskly, Trump feels the urge to pretend he's considering a run for some ever-changing political position: mayor, governor, president, President for Life. Back in October, he was hinting yet again at a totally real run for president . That bout of hinting passed without Trump ever making a formal announcement, both because it's way too early for presidential candidates to start declaring themselves and because he will never actually run for anything.

But four days ago, Buzzfeed's McKay Coppins called Trump's bluff.

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The MTA Will Be Disciplining the Station Agent Who Gave Everybody the Double Middle Finger

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Video by Jonathan Pillot; screenshot via.
The Metropolitan Transportation Authority is very unhappy with the man you see above, a station agent at West 4th Street who apparently reacts to the frustrations of his job with exuberant double-fingered salutes.

Manhattanite Jonathan Pillot shared a video of the agent to his Facebook page; it shows Pillot and the agent, who the New York Post reports is named Stephen C. Herbert, mid-argument, after Pillot says he witnessed the agent behaving rudely towards an elderly woman.

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Here's the Official Post-Election Petition Asking Obama to Let New York Secede from the Country

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Up until election night, there was a legitimate, widespread fear that President Obama was going to lose the 2012 election. Liberals were pissed; many even spoke about moving to Canada, or Australia, or Britain, or any place that wasn't the United States but where people still spoke English.

Then came the Jeep bounce and the Sandy/Christie bounce, and Obama did exactly what Nate Silver said Obama was going to do, destroying challenger Mitt Romney in a lopsided race to 270 electoral votes, finishing with a total 332 to Romney's 206. Conservatives panicked and many spoke about moving to Canada, or Australia, or Britain, until they looked the destinations up on Wikipedia and realized that nationalized healthcare, women's rights and the like exist there, too.

So some brave, pioneering, conservative souls did the next best thing and said, "Fuck it, we're gonna secede."

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Wodka Vodka Pulls 'Christmas Quality, Hanukkah Pricing' Billboard

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ABC 7
Remember the Wodka Vodka billboard from yesterday? The billboard on the West Side Highway read "Christmas Quality, Hanukkah Pricing" and shows a Chihuahua in a Santa hat next to an Afghan hound in a yarmulke. The billboard stirred up quite a bit of controversy and accusations of anti-Semitism after Gawker posted a photo of it. The Anti-Defamation League got involved, calling the billboard "crude and offensive."

The general outrage worked! Wodka Vodka has taken down the billboard.

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Drunkorexia: The New Not Eating Is Drinking

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Experts have identified the latest phenomenon affecting "thousands of women," and it has quite the catchy name. One part binge-drinking and one part anorexia, it is...drunkorexia. Bent on "staying slim" and getting drunk as quickly as possible (and spending money on booze rather than food) one in six college women are skipping meals and instead just boozing. We are not ashamed to admit that we know from personal history that this is a truly terrible idea, and we did not need researchers from the University of Missouri to tell us so. Nonetheless, they did.

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