As Myles wrote on Monday, it's high time to throw away your old, dead Christmas tree. But while doing so, please dispose of it properly! According to the blog Strollerderby, a Christmas tree was seen in flames, in the East Village, the other night. It managed to set an entire minivan on fire. (EV Grieve says this happened on 7th Street between A and 1st, and has photos -- it appears that the car's windows were blown out from the fire.)
Oh, New Year's Eve. The most dreaded of holidays is fast approaching. CBS New York reports that the Times Square Ball is being installed today. But where should you venture come December 31? Luckily Priceline.com made a list of the"Top 50 New Year's Destinations for U.S. Travelers." (Read: "top New Year's Destinations To Stay Away From.") 
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Good morning one and all. How was your Christmas? Did you occupy something? A movie theater perhaps? Though Santa has already been tracked, presents have already been opened, and some of us have had our traditional fill of Chinese food, it's still technically a holiday today, according to the government. So, Merry Christmas, round two! We have compiled some of the things New York City tells us we should expect for this day-after-day. 
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The "Santa industry" is a particularly good one to be in if you're a portly old white man, apparently. A company called Thumbtack did a study of the business of being Santa Claus and found that it's a pretty sweet deal a lot of the time. Of the 169 Santas that Thumbtack interviewed, the average hourly rate was a hefty $137.50. That's not bad for a job that solely involves sitting down and chuckling. 
Everything you thought you knew about Santa may be a lie! According to the New York Historical Society, Santa is not, despite all of our assumptions, a native North Pole-ian, complete with North Pole-like ideologies, politics, and annoying habits. He's actually a sophisticated New Yorker hailing from West 23rd Street. They base this on the poem "A Visit from St. Nicholas," (you know, "Twas the night before Christmas, etc. etc.") believed to be written by theologian and Hebrew scholar -- and Chelsea resident, even if it wasn't called that at the time -- Clement Clarke Moore. Which seems to indicate that Santa is not, actually, real, but instead a figment of Moore's imagination. What are you telling us, New York Historical Society!?
It's that time of year again! The time when you go to a public place with ice and skate about to cheesy piped-in tunes with your boy or girlfriend and suddenly, awash in love, rosy from the fresh air, he or she proposes. Fortunately, there is an audience of your peers to videotape and comment upon the momentous event. And fortunately, also, you say yes, because...does anyone ever say no? We want to see that video.
More »Brooklyn Christmas Tree from Chris Kirkinis on Vimeo.
Everything good and decent in this world gets a time-lapse video, right? Right. Such is the case for the Brooklyn (Hipster) Christmas Tree, created by 26-year-old Aussie expat Julian Cole. Watch the stylized time-lapse of the making, by Chris Kirkinis, and feel holiday-ish. There are snowflakes. There are hoodies! More »
On Monday and Tuesday an event went down in the Flatiron Pedestrian Plaza that involved a number of presumably happy couples lip-locking under what is reported to be "the largest pair of mistletoe in the world" measuring 10 feet tall, each with a 2-foot-wide "ball" of mistletoe. No one got hurt! 
8,327 [correction: 16,654] people were enticed to kiss underneath these large green things in conjunction with FindYourFacemate.com, an online dating service that uses facial recognition software to pair people up. (Research shows that people are more likely to be attracted to others whose facial features are similar to theirs, but we'll allow you to explore that on your own, minus any relatives.)
Yesterday we noted, thanks to New York Shitty and the L Magazine, that there was a Christmas tree "growing" in Brooklyn. Made of PBRs implanted in a tree-shape in the McCarren Park fence at Bedford and North 12th, plus red and green painted sneakers, a star made of Metrocards, plastic bags, tinsel, and other found items, the tree was immediately dubbed the "Hipster Christmas Tree," partly because of the PBR, partly because of its location, and partly because the word hipster is bandied about like a pair of sweat socks at a Dirty Christmas party. 
Happy holidays! This is when we cut down trees, decorate them with a billion lights and stars and shiny things, and watch them die. It's also when we walk down sidewalks and inhale deeply and pretend, if only for a minute, that we live in the forest -- and when we chug all of the cheap beers we can and stick them into a fence outside of McCarren Park in the general shape of a fir tree, along with some red and green shoes and a star made of Metrocards and a bunch of plastic bags, and call it Christmas. To each his own. 
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