Local Strippers Also Horrified by Long Island Nursing Home That Hired a Male Dancer

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Photo via Ray, Mitev & Associates
The classiest news story of the week comes to us from West Babylon, Long Island, where a man named Franklin Youngblood is suing his mother Bernice's nursing home, on the grounds that they hired a male stripper to perform for the residents. Youngblood is suing East Neck Nursing and Rehabilitation Center on behalf of both himself and his mother, alleging that the strip show caused "disrespect, dishonor, embarrassment, ridicule and humiliation" in the residents, as well as "loss of dignity."

Franklin states in his suit, filed by attorney John Ray, that he went to visit his mother in January of 2013. It was then that he discovered the photo you see above, depicting a muscular, tighty-whitey-clad gentleman leaning over Bernice, hands on the back of her wheelchair, "clutching a wad of bills," as the suit notes. The elderly woman on Bernice's left, Franklin adds, "appear[ed] to be crying."

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Maybe Facebook Would Let Photographer Spencer Tunick Post Naked Pics If He Worked for Sports Illustrated

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Photo by Spencer Tunick
"Dead Sea 3," 2011
Last month, we told you about photographer Spencer Tunick's ongoing struggles with Facebook : Tunick takes non-sexual, not particularly explicit photos of nude people, typically large groups of them. Then Facebook takes some of those photos down, freezes his account, and occasionally threatens him with the deletion of his page . It's a vicious cycle, and not fun for anybody, particularly Spencer Tunick.

A spokesperson from Facebook told us at the time that with few exceptions, the company doesn't just pull photos down of their own volition. (Those exceptions, he said, involved extreme and graphic images involving things like child pornography.) First, someone has to flag the photo as objectionable; if a content monitor employed by Facebook agrees, the photo comes down. And Chris Park, a representative from the company, told Tunick that if he had any questions about whether a specific photo might violate Facebook's nudity guidelines, he could email said photo to Park, and he'd let him know where it stood.

Tunick was slightly uncomfortable with that plan, telling us he was ambivalent about the idea that "someone in an office in the middle of wherever - Nebraska, San Francisco - that one person decides what's OK or not when it comes to the body in art." But he was game to give it a try. On Valentine's Day, Tunick sent over six photos, which Park told him he'd forwarded to the company's "policy folks." Four days later, Tunick got his answer.

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Photographer Spencer Tunick Can't Stop Running Afoul of Facebook's Baffling Rules on Naked People

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Photo by Spencer Tunick; image courtesy of the artist.
New York-based photographer Spencer Tunick takes beautiful pictures of naked people. You've probably seen some of those photos; he's become internationally famous over the past two decades for staging photos of "nude figures in public settings," as he puts it, everything from a lone woman curled around the cab of a truck to thousands of people splayed across Mexico City's Zocalo.

Tunick's work, though it isn't remotely sexual or pornographic, has still incited controversy; he even made it all the way to the Supreme Court, after he was arrested five times between 1995 and 2005 while staging his public nude shots. He was usually charged with "unlawful assembly." At least once, his camera was confiscated. Eventually, Tunick sued New York City and the NYPD, arguing that the constant arresting was an infringement on his First Amendment rights. He won.

But now Tunick faces a different and more implacable foe: Facebook. He can't share an uncensored photo of his work without it immediately being taken down. And as he recently discovered, even a pixelated photo is apparently not OK, unless the pixels are so enormous they take up most of the photo. Smaller pixels resulted in Facebook freezing his account and threatening him with deletion. Instagram is also not fond of nudes. So what's an artist whose subject is the naked body to do?

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Bloomberg Gets in Everybody's Pants This Week

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Likes big butts; cannot lie.
Today, Bloomberg becomes the first mayor to lay claim to a sixth borough: the supple flesh hidden beneath our pants.

Oh yes, there's nothing like a good body part to get our outgoing mayor's juices flowing. A New York magazine feature on his possible replacement, Christine Quinn, was completely overshadowed by a comment Bloomberg made to the reporter while admiring a party guest: "Look at the ass on her."

Earlier this morning, Bloomberg proved that he's an equal-opportunity objectifier, complimenting Joe Biden on his fleshy bits: "You know, Joe Biden, you can joke about him all you want, he's got a set of balls and says what he believes," the mayor told Politico, regarding the vice president's supportive comments about gay marriage last year.

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FBI Agent Arrested For Driving Without Pants and Allegedly Trying to Seduce a Truck Driver

Categories: FBI, Naked People

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Some law enforcement officers like to unwind from a tough week on the job with a nice drink. Apparently one Buffalo, N.Y. FBI agent prefers to unwind by unzipping his pants and seducing truck drivers.

John A. Yervelli, a 48-year-old special agent for the FBI's Buffalo office, allegedly pulled alongside a truck on an upstate thruway, signaled to the driver of the truck that he was not wearing any pants and proceeded to make lewd gestures, according to a Buffalo News report.

The alleged incident occurred around 9 p.m. Friday night -- (you know, around the time when most agents might de-stress at the bar, relax at home with their families or generally not drive pants-less on a thruway.)

Not long after the truck driver alerted authorities, Yervelli was pulled over by a state trooper and arrested on misdemeanor public lewdness charges. He faces up to 30 days in jail and a $500 fine if convicted, according to the report.

No word yet on whether Yervelli will keep his job or whether pants-less driving violates bureau protocol.

If You See A Penis At Medgar Evers College, You're Advised To "Scream As Loud As You Can." Then Seek Therapy

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So, it happens to you: that awkward moment when you're walking to class, work, wherever, and some weirdo whips out his penis. What do you do?

According to the Public Safety Department at Medgar Evers College in Brooklyn, you're supposed to "scream as loud as you can." Then you're supposed to seek "professional counseling" if the sight of some stranger's shlong leaves you traumatized.

Those are just two of six suggestions outlined in a campus-wide email -- which you can see below -- issued to faculty and students at MEC following a spike in flashings in recent weeks.

While screaming like a banshee and debating whether to see a shrink, officials also want you to make sure and soak in everything a flasher has to offer -- "notice hair and eye color, any tattoos or piercings, age, and their height and weight" so you can describe the flasher to authorities.

On the other hand, you could always just realize that this is New York City and there's a good chance that at some point in your life you'll encounter some weirdo who wants to show you his dick -- then just look away, try and burn the image of strange wiener out of your brain, call the cops, and go about your day.
Or you can go the therapy route -- whatever works.

See the entire email below.

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Naked Green People Fighting The Spectra Gas Pipeline Construction In The West Village [UPDATE: Video]

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Stacy Lanyon
Protesters painted themselves a toxic green to protest the construction of a new pipeline for fracked natural gas in Manhattan.
Activists protesting the construction of a new natural gas pipeline into the heart of Manhattan stepped up their efforts to draw attention to the issue this weekend by getting naked, painting their bodies green, and dancing along the West Side Highway.

See More: Naked Green People Fight Pipeline Construction (NSFW)

The NJ-NY Expansion Project, known familiarly as the Spectra Pipeline after the Texas-based energy company behind it, runs about 16 miles from Staten Island, through New Jersey, and under the Hudson before surfacing in the West Village.

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There's A Chance The Confused Naked Guy Wandering Around New Jersey Wasn't On Drugs

Categories: Naked People

In our experience, the first question that needs to be asked whenever there's a story about a naked guy wandering around in public is "so...what drugs was he on?"

That said, there's an outside chance that a guy found wandering around the woods in New Jersey over the weekend was sober as a judge.
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This Is A Picture Of A Naked Woman Walking Into A Lumber Store

Categories: Naked People
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Facebook

No shirt, no shoes, no pants, no underwear -- no problem. At least for an Upstate woman, who walked into a lumber store completely naked yesterday. That, however, was only after she walked into a nearby convenience store, also in the buff.

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