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Subway fares might be going up, The MTA's capital plan might be funded by debt, and the city's mass transit lines might be overrun by rats but hey, commuting in New York might not be all bad.
Boingo and Transit Wireless will start hooking up wifi in the city's subway stations over the next five years, according to an announcement today.
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Reggie Allen is no criminal mastermind.
Cops say that 34-year-old Allen brought two loaded firearms -- including a Tec-9 semi-automatic pistol and a .45 caliber semi-automatic handgun -- into a crowded Times Square subway station on New Year's Day.
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When stuff like this happens we tend to be at a loss for words. Joseph Anderson, the principal at the Clinton School for Writers and Artists on West 33rd Street, plagiarized part of his graduation speech from a commencement address David Foster Wallace gave in 2005 at Kenyon College, the Daily News reports. We could bemoan how dumb this is on Anderson's part and how his statement that his lack of attribution was an "oversight" seems like a bunch of baloney, but that's obvious. Instead, we'll just leave you with an adaptation of the original speech, published upon Wallace's death in the Wall Street Journal. It is remarkable, and a principal at a school for writers and artists should at least know that a half-assed emulation of a work of art cannot do said work justice. [NYDN]
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A subset of nomadic amusement park workers have issued grievance towards President Obama for remarks he made during yesterday's birth certificate press conference. During the press conference, which was held to disprove a bunch of lunatics, Obama said, "We're not going to be able to solve our problems if we get distracted by sideshows and carnival barkers." Carnival workers are upset because of his use of the term, "carnival barker." America has turned into a massive malfunctioning tilt-a-whirl, and it's not going to stop no matter how much you vomit.
In 1942, a team of Nazi saboteurs armed with bomb-making supplies and instructions to perform multiple acts of terrorism emerged on the shores of Long Island and Florida. Details of this mission from a MI5 intelligence officer were recently declassified, Yahoo reports, and they paint a story of intrigue and espionage. Fortunately, this crack team of spies made the Three Stooges look like Delta Force.
"Hogan!"
The Board of Regents is meeting today to discuss various new educational measures, including one that would add an extra 20 days to school -- cutting summer vacation in half. The Board of Regents can't seem to find a way to prepare students for college, so their latest plan is to increase the amount of time students spend in school. Another one of the Board's dozen plans includes expanding the school day to eight hours. And there are more tortures, too...
According to a new poll, over half of Republican primary voters don't believe Barack Obama was born in the United States. Politico reports that Public Policy Polling asked 400 people across the country who planned on voting in the GOP primaries where they thought President Obama was born. 51 percent responded they didn't think he wasn't born in the United States. Everyone take a deep breath, count to 10, and consult your apocalypse manual.
The Super Bowl is stupid. We say that and we're football fans here at Runnin' Scared. Watching the "big game," as it is referred to by companies attempting to profit off its popularity without paying licensing fees, is a useful exercise in being a stupid person for an entire day. Don't believe us? Let's go over what Sunday will be like for you and the millions of other stupid people who will be watching the Super Bowl:
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