Amish

Ohio Amish Under Investigation For Beard-Cutting

By Rosie Gray Thu., Oct. 6 2011 at 8:59 AM
Categories: Amish, Crime, Rosie Gray, The Flyover, WTF

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Amish crime: a growing threat? First we had the buggy safety-triangle ring, and now we're contending with a group in Ohio who are under investigation for allegedly breaking into people's homes and cutting off their hair and beards. At least four sheriff's departments (!) are investigating members of the Amish community near Bergholz -- the so-called "Bergholz Clan" -- for cutting off the beards and hair of numerous victims, including a 13-year-old girl and a 74-year-old man.

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Amish

The Amish Sell Exotic Animals, Are Even More Badass Than You Thought

By Rosie Gray Mon., Oct. 3 2011 at 1:44 PM
Categories: Amish, Animals, Awesomeness, The Flyover

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Alligators! Elk! Kangaroos and kinkajous! Parrots! Poison-arrow frogs! And an "irate African aardvark"! It sounds like an exotic bazaar in some faraway land but it's actually an auction in Amish country, explored in this delightful piece in The Daily. Here at Runnin' Scared we stay up on Amish news, and this is particularly interesting: thrice yearly, the Mid Ohio Alternative Animal and Bird Sale takes place in Mount Hope, Ohio, in an area that apparently has the highest Amish concentration in the country. We would give our right arm to go to this.

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Sports

Kentucky Derby Will Be Decadent, Depraved

By Rosie Gray Sat., May 7 2011 at 3:37 PM
Categories: Rosie Gray, Shitshows, Sports, The Flyover, Things You Should Know

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Hunter S. Thompson went so you don't have to:

The rest of the day blurs into madness. The rest of that night too. And all the next day and night. Such horrible things occurred that I can't bring myself even to think about them now, much less put them down in print. I was lucky to get out at all. One of my clearest memories of that vicious time is Ralph being attacked by one of my old friends in the billiard room of the Pendennis Club in downtown Louisville on Saturday night. The man had ripped his own shirt open to the waist before deciding that Ralph was after his wife. No blows were struck, but the emotional effects were massive. Then, as a sort of final horror, Steadman put his fiendish pen to work and tried to patch things up by doing a little sketch of the girl he'd been accused of hustling. That finished us in the Pedennis.

Tune in to the Kentucky Derby today at 5 p.m.

[@_rosiegray]

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That's Racist!

Oklahoma Will Now Be Taken Over by Muslims, Hopefully

By Foster Kamer Mon., Nov. 8 2010 at 4:25 PM
Categories: Foster Kamer, Islam, That's Racist!, The First Amendment, The Flyover

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Somewhere near the heart of America, a plot to infiltrate the soul of this great nation is underway, and has moved a step further. Yes, folks, a judge -- those formidable black-robed enemies of the state -- has struck down an amendment to Oklahoma's constitution that would bar the use of Islamic Religious Law in state courts. May Baby Jesus, or Moses, or the Kwanzaa Bunny, anything other than that "Allah" feller have mercy on our souls.

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Video and Tell

The "Ground Zero Victory Mosque" Attack Ad (Video)

By Foster Kamer Wed., Sep. 15 2010 at 5:25 PM
Categories: Foster Kamer, Islam, Paranoia Politics, Politics, The "Ground Zero Mosque", The Flyover, Video and Tell

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It only took psychopaths from outside of New York City what, a month? The inevitable "Ground Zero Victory Mosque" attack ad has finally arrived. Via The Atlantic, it comes from a conservative PAC from Iowa, and yes, it's as gross as you imagined it to be.

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Unmitigated Outrage

Dear Rest-of-America: Take This Map, It's Why You're Wrong About the "Ground Zero Mosque"

By Foster Kamer Mon., Aug. 16 2010 at 3:20 PM
Categories: 9/11, Featured, Foster Kamer, Ground Zero, Maps, The "Ground Zero Mosque", The Flyover, This Is How It Works, Unmitigated Outrage
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​According to a recent Siena Research Institute poll, over half of New Yorkers polled think that the "Ground Zero Mosque" will promote racial and religious tolerance, or are open to the idea of it. Yet: 68% of Americans oppose it, despite the endorsements of New York City's mayor and the President of the United States of America. But that's not why you're wrong, America. This, however, is.More »
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Politics

Go Cocks? South Carolina Senate Candidate Alvin Greene's College Porn Problem

By Foster Kamer Fri., Aug. 13 2010 at 1:45 PM
Categories: Campus Crime, Foster Kamer, Politics, Porn, The Flyover

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This is what one gets in Carolina for trying to "share the love," huh?

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Media Ppl

Terry Gross: Nasty Girl of NPR Burned by Mississippi, Totally Doable

By Foster Kamer Fri., Jul. 16 2010 at 4:30 PM
Categories: Foster Kamer, Media Ppl, NPR, Rednecks, Terry Gross, The Flyover, Things That Are Sexy

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I'd hit it.
The Brooklyn-bred hotness that is NPR's Fresh Air host -- The Notorious T.E.R.R.Y. G.R.O.S.S. -- is also apparently Right Said Fred-level too sexy for your radio.

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The Flyover

The Obama White House Is Having a Bit of a Vermin Problem

By Jen Doll Tue., Jun. 22 2010 at 4:38 PM
Categories: Adorable Animals in Trouble, Barack Obama, Jen Doll, The Flyover, Violence, White House

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via New York Times
Why is the Obama White House so pestered by pestilence? Last year, there was the fly that Obama killed during an interview with John Harwood for CNBC and the Times, an act which drew the perhaps displaced anger of many an insect-lover. (Have you ever been tortured by a buzzing fly? We dare you not to kill it, assuming you have the POTUS's Mr. Miyagi-esque reflexes.)

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Mental Health

Reason to Live in NYC #78: We've Got Enough Good Shrinks

By Foster Kamer Thu., Mar. 4 2010 at 12:30 PM
Categories: Mental Health, Reasons to Live in NYC, The Flyover

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Or at least, enough so that you wouldn't have to visit yours in jail, even after they were accused of trying to murder one of their patients. With a sword. A two-foot sword. The Kentucky Enquirer reports today on Covington, Kentucky, psychiatrist Douglas Rank, whose patients actually tried to visit him behind bars.

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Mental Health, Reasons to Live in NYC, Shrinks
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