Relax! Your Astrological Sign Has Not Changed. Probably.

ZOMG! We were stressed about the latest life-changing astrological information, which actually is not "news" at all, but something people have known about for years! Still, we were stressed! Fortunately, CNN puts an end to our worries that our astrological sign might have changed with the very important news that it (probably) did not: "If [people] adhered to the tropical zodiac -- which, if they're a Westerner, they probably did -- absolutely nothing has changed for them." As they go on to explain,

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Central Park Gets 9 Inches of Snow; There's Snow on the Ground in 49 of 50 States

via @DevonGrandy/Twitpic
The snow count is in. We got 9.1 inches last night (according to numbers in Central Park, via NY1). That does not a blizzard make, but it's pretty, for the moment! No major public transport delays, though the MTA has issued a Winter Weather Service Advisory. In related news:

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Verizon iPhone Is FINALLY a Reality

via Engadget
The long-awaited day has finally come. Verizon has announced they'll start selling the iPhone early next month. Preorders start February 3. The phone will cost you $199.99 with a 2-year contract. It's expected that as many as 13 million iPhones may be sold by Verizon in the first year. And -- it can act as a Wi-Fi hotspot too! AT&T is pissed. [Bloomberg Businessweek, Engadget]

In 2011, We All May Have Jobs, Yet!

Cover from August 2009
According to the weekly report from the Labor Department, new jobless claims have fallen to the lowest level since July 2008, declining 34,000 for the week ending on Christmas Day. Apparently "seasonal layoffs" often pick up in that week, which seems particularly shitty, so we're glad this year they didn't. The Wall Street Journal reports that this decline "provides some basis for optimism" about the labor market in general -- maybe we'll finally beat back that 9.8% unemployment rate in 2011. Crossing our fingers for the new year. [JDoll]

Brooklyn "Punch Me Panda" a Little Bit Sado, a Little Bit Masochist

via WSJ/Rob Bennett
Have you seen a man in a panda costume getting punched and kicked in Brooklyn? Have you, perhaps, kicked and punched this very panda yourself? And did you enjoy it? The Wall Street Journal investigates. In other news, Friday often has the flavor of watermelon Jolly Ranchers.

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Greenpoint Woman Narrowly Escapes Being Devoured by Sidewalk

Photo by Stefano Giovannini, via the Brooklyn Paper
Philippa Kaye, a Greenpoint resident, faced a reality that is the stuff of nightmares (not ours, we're not that screwed up) this weekend as she innocently passed Flatbush and Fifth Avenues to view the New York City marathon. That's when she "encountered a hole in the sidewalk so massive it swallowed her whole," reports the Brooklyn Paper. As you can see from the photo at right.

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NYC Marathon: Making You Feel Worthless, One Runner at a Time

Every once in a while (okay, fine, probably more often than not, seeing as how we live in New York), a person comes along who, for whatever reason, makes us feel like a worthless piece of lazy crap. Like that chick who beat the shit out of the man who attempted to rob her last night in the East Village. Or, like Larry Lewis, the 53-year-old New Yorker who plans to run his 28th consecutive marathon on Sunday.

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Female Crash Test Dummies Are Here! Women Are...Psyched?

5th Overall resized.jpg
Finally, after years of waiting and hoping and protesting for equal rights, equal pay, and equal, er, "death standards," women are getting their own female crash test dummies to be used in government safety tests, starting in 2011. Let us all celebrate this fine day that will surely go down in the history books as...the moment that we women finally, after all that nagging, got our own crash test dummies!

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