Nasty Winter Storm Wreaking Havoc on New York

emeryway via Flickr
It is ugly out there. Winter storm Nika swept into town late last night, bringing with her heavy snow, sleet, freezing rain, traffic jams, public transit delays, and a risk of power outages.

The National Weather Service is forecasting accumulations of 4 to 6 inches of snow, and a quarter inch to four tenths of an inch of ice. The ice building up on tree limbs and power lines could cause power outages. The winter storm warning will remain in effect until 6 p.m. Wednesday.

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De Blasio Warns New Yorkers to Stay Home Thursday Night As Blizzard Approaches

Categories: Weather Or Not

David Shankbone via Flickr
It had not started snowing in New York City on Thursday afternoon, but Mayor Bill de Blasio (on his second day on the job) was already cautioning New Yorkers to stay in Thursday night.

"Please stay home tonight, and stay off the roads," de Blasio said at a press conference following the swearing-in of police commissioner Bill Bratton on Thursday afternoon.

As of 3:56 p.m. Wednesday afternoon, a blizzard watch was in effect and the National Weather Service was anticipating six to ten inches of snow, wind gusts up to 45 miles per hour, and wind chill possibly dipping as low as -5 degrees starting Thursday afternoon, and continuing through Friday morning. The worst of the storm is expected to roll into town around 9 p.m.

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Thanksgiving Travel Forecast: Flooded Streets and Flight Delays

Categories: Weather Or Not

Wednesday, November 27 is one of nine days this year in hellish enough, traffic-wise, to earn the distinction of appearing on the Department of Transportation's Holiday Gridlock Alert list. That determination is made months in advance, just by looking at the calendar.

Road, rail, and air traffic was always going to be bad on Wednesday, but it's going be be significantly worse than expected due to a particularly poor timed low-pressure weather system sweeping into town.

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Updated: Tornado Watch in Effect for New York City, and a Severe Thunderstorm Watch

Categories: Weather Or Not

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Affected area in red.
Update, 2:55 p.m.: There is now a severe thunderstorm watch in effect too. More information below.

The National Weather Service has issued a tornado watch for New York City, effective until 5 p.m. Monday.

Meteorologists are predicting heavy rain, gusty winds, thunderstorms, and potential tornado action across a stretch of New York state.

Counties affected include Albany, Bronx, Broome, Cayuga, Chemung, Chenango, Columbia, Cortland, Delaware, Dutchess, Fulton, Greene, Hamilton, Herkimer, Kings, Madison, Montgomery, New York, Oneida, Onondaga, Orange, Otsego, Putnam, Queens, Rensselaer, Richmond, Rockland, Saratoga, Schenectady, Schoharie, Schuyler, Seneca, Steuben, Sullivan, Tioga, Tompkins, Ulster, Warren, Washington, Westchester, and Yates.

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Andrew Cuomo Actually Acknowledges Idiot Rabbi's Gay Marriage/Hurricane Rant


Every time a natural disaster destroys entire communities, a handful of religious idiots blame it on gay people and the politicians who defend their civil rights. Hurricane Sandy is no exception.

In most cases, however, the moronic ramblings of fringe lunatics are routinely ignored by elected officials. That, however, is not the case with Hurricane Sandy.

In the aftermath of the storm, wing-nut Southern Christians claimed the hurricane was God's way of punishing the New York State Legislature for voting in favor of gay marriage. But Southern Christians aren't the only idiots who think unfortunate weather is divine punishment for defying God's word (as it's explained in thousands-of-years-old works of fiction).

Enter Rabbi Noson Leiter, the leader of the group Torah Jews for Decency, who is the latest homophobe to blame a storm on gays who occupy lower Manhattan -- which he describes as "one of the national centers for homosexuality."

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Here's a Somewhat Threatening Letter Andrew Cuomo Sent To Utility CEOs

Nearly 600,000 New Yorkers still are without power after Hurricane Sandy wreaked havoc on the Big Apple earlier this week, and Governor Andrew Cuomo appears to be a little pissed off.

The governor sent a letter to the CEOs and presidents of seven utility companies telling them -- in no uncertain terms -- that he plans to hold them accountable for their preparation (or lack thereof) for the storm, which he apparently thinks is the reason so many people still are without electricity.

"If you failed to prepare, however, as evidenced by your response, it is a failure to keep your part of the bargain - a failure to keep the trust that New Yorkers have placed in you by granting you the privilege to conduct utility business in New York State; in particular, the certificates of public convenience and necessity ("Certificate") granted by the State under the Public Service Law," Cuomo says in his letter. "New Yorkers should not suffer because electric utilities did not reasonably prepare for this eventuality. In the context of the ongoing emergency, such a failure constitutes a breach of the public trust."

See Cuomo's letter below.

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ManBearPig Resurrected: Is Global Warming To Blame For Sandy's Destruction?

As you know, weather happened in New York City this week, leaving dozens dead, millions without power, and pundits arguing about whether "Global Warming" is an actual thing.

Mayor Mike Bloomberg appears to be on the side of Al Gore and the Inconvenient Truth-ers -- yesterday, the mayor endorsed President Barack Obama in this year's presidential election, citing "climate change" contributing to Hurricane Sandy's wrath as his primary reason.

Governor Andrew Cuomo fell short of blaming the hurricane on Global Warming during a press conference Wednesday, but he noted that New York needs to come up with a better way to prepare for "a 100-year flood every two years."

Global Warming is a touchy subject -- many look at it as a serious problem that could potentially lead to the destruction of the planet. Others see it as a left-wing conspiracy dreamed up by Gore -- et al -- to scare the shit out of people.

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Here's How To Not Get Scammed By Hurricane Opportunists

Tip No. 1: Don't let this guy fix your house.

So, your house was destroyed and it's time to rebuild. You're probably going to need a contractor. Unfortunately, there are a lot of slimeballs out there who will undoubtedly do whatever they can to scam hurricane victims and exploit a natural disaster for personal gain.

But there are ways to reduce the risk of getting victimized by these shameless hurricane opportunists -- many of which are explained by New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman.

Last night, Schneiderman offered suggestions on how to keep New York's hurricane victims safe from predatory scumbags looking to rip us off.

See Schneiderman's suggestions below.

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Iranian Technology, Gays, Women's Suffrage All Credited With Causing Hurricane Sandy

Naked Pastor
Hurricane Sandy was caused by Iranian technology that's capable of controlling weather patterns to punish Iran's enemies and the enemies of its friends. The reason the storm hit New York so hard is because God is punishing the Empire State for defying his word and allowing gay people to get married.

But what really caused the storm was "American arrogance" -- it's just nature's way of giving the U.S. a "divine slap" for its godless policies, including allowing women to vote.

Those are just a few of the theories laid out on the blogosphere by morons who unfortunately are allowed Internet access.

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Hurricane Sandy: Queens 9-Year-Old Has Seen "Way Worse"

Our apologies for our two-day absence. We were holed up in an apartment in an "evacuation zone" in Long Island City that, as it turns out, we probably should have evacuated.

We've since escaped to the (umm) safety (?) of Crown Heights, Brooklyn, after the floodwaters receded in LIC, and Con Ed was yet to restore power to the apartment in which we were stranded for the duration of the storm.

While we were there, however, we met a (roughly) nine-year-old Queens boy who claims he has seen "way worse" than the devastation brought on by that bitch Sandy -- and he told us about it after diving right into the roughly three feet of water that was in the stairwell of the apartment building in which we were trapped.

Just to be clear, there's absolutely no way in hell this kid has seen anything close to what happened in Long Island City on Monday night; cars were floating down the fucking street -- and he's nine. But the Rambo-esque way in which he said it made us want to believe -- he might as well have had a knife between his teeth.

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