Calm down -- it's a knuckle.

The Daily Mail published an article yesterday about a photo that was removed from Facebook because it appeared to show the ta-tas of a blond woman sitting in a bathtub. The alleged tits actually were just her elbows -- her voluptuous, firm elbows -- and the photo was later restored.

Over the weekend, a thirtysomething former Marine/cop, completely mature, successful businessman -- who will remain nameless -- sent me the image posted to the right, along with the following description: "Fatty with a landing strip."

It became clear that knuckles are way pornier than elbows.

What followed was an exchange of "knuckle porn" neither of us are particularly proud of.

See some of the highlights below.

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Cortland County District Attorney Mark Suben, a.k.a. "Jose the Janitor."

The mustached American to the right is Cortland County District Attorney Mark Suben, who was re-elected earlier this month to a second term as the county's top prosecutor. You may also know him as "Jose the Janitor" from the 1970s porn flick "Dr.'s Teenage Dilemma."

Before he went to law school, Suben was a 1970s porn start who went by the name "Gus Thomas."

He starred in dozens of XXX films in the early 70s. He then lied about it when he ran for D.A. in 2012.

Last week -- after he'd already been re-elected -- Suben came clean.

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www.mylittletime.com

A New Jersey woman is suing an Iowa-based marketing company after a video it shot of her breastfeeding her daughter was converted into "breastfeeding porn" and circulated across the Internet.

Until today, we didn't know "breastfeeding porn" was even a thing. So, naturally, we spent a good chunk of our morning "researching" the bizarre genre, and are happy to report that it's totally not 100 percent, completely, unbelievably weird, or anything...at all. It's just like regular porn -- if regular porn consisted of people getting sprayed with, rolling around in, and "baby bird-ing" breast milk.

Check some of it out here (Warning: absolutely NSFW/100 percent, completely, unbelievably weird).

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