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American Idol Week Four: The Beatles? Really?

Posted by Tom Breihan at 2:26 PM, March 13, 2008

chikezie.jpg
I would pay five dollars to watch this guy punch David Arculeta in the face

So: the Beatles. The most important band in the history of the universe ever. I like maybe seven of their songs. Those of us born after the band's breakup have spent our entire lives being continually blasted with information about how great and world-changing they were, information that most recently took the form of a ghastly, endless Cirque du Soleil tribute at this year's Grammys. This week, American Idol jumped on board, Ryan Seacrest constantly declaiming what a coup it was when the show secured the rights to the Lennon/McCartney songbook while the top twelve contestants desperately tried to find ways to make these songs work. Most important band ever or not, does anyone ever listen to the Beatles for the vocals? At least in the context of today's scenery-chewing robo-virtuosos, were Lennon and McCartney even good singers? Or, more to the point, were their songs conceived as showcases for vocal pyrotechnics? If we're to believe Simon Cowell, the American Idol competitors are chosen above all for their technical abilities, but how do you put those technical abilities on display when you're singing, say, "I Saw Her Standing There"?

Well, David Hernandez, who'd apparently spent some of his strip-club tips on a college-level Beatles class, tried. And the result, predictably enough, was all over the place, Hernandez trying to find room for his quavery George Michael runs while the backing singers ran rings around him. It wasn't exactly a surprise when he got voted off last night, but then, at least half of this week's contestants put themselves in danger with some seriously ill-advised moves. Syesha Mercado turned "Got to Get You into My Life" into uber-bland Vegas neo-soul and made the bottom three. Kristy Lee Cook turned "Eight Days a Week" into ADD bluegrass and made the bottom three. (Actually, the problem wasn't so much Cook, who did what she could with it, but the arrangement. The drums never came close to matching up with anything else; it was like one of those death-metal songs where the double-bass pummel never stops no matter what else might be going on.) Further up the food chain, Ramiele Malubay, who I'm liking less every week, pretty much fell asleep on "In My Life" while Amanda Overmyer did a take on "You Can't Do That" that basically amounted to an audition for the next godawful Blues Brothers sequel. Most gratifyingly, former presumptive nominee David Archuleta tried out the Stevie Wonder version of "We Can Work It Out" and crashed and burned in the process: forgetting lyrics, grimacing, and generally looking like the little kid who he's probably never had a chance to be. If my blog's comments section are any indication (and I sure hope not), Archuleta is still teflon right now. But a few more shows like that, and I'm guessing the grammatically unschooled teenagers of America will lose patience with this creepy little elf-kid.

We're fully into the meat of the Idol season now; last night's results shows brought back the unbearable movie tie-ins (Jim Carrey) and hilariously awkward group-sing car commercials (Cake's "The Distance"!) of seasons past. And one of the nice things about the more specific theme-shows is that all the contestants have to leave their comfort zones at some point or another. A vetted-from-babyhood stage-child like Archuleta can coast through the early rounds singing songs he's sung a billion times, but when he has to engage with stuff that's new to him (like, uh, the Beatles?), he's lost, whereas some of the more interesting contestants can actually make something out of what they've been given. I no longer have any doubts, for instance, as to Brooke White's singing abilities; she treated "Let It Be" like the Starbucks-pop manna it is. Chikezie, meanwhile, absolutely stepped his game up on the bigger stage, turning "She's a Woman" into an unlikely defining moment and finding his swagger, giving us the closest thing we got to a revelatory performance this week. I would've liked to see Jason Castro sing "Across the Universe" (that one went to blowhard hack Michael Johns instead), but he did a pretty good job turning "If I Fell" into his usual breezy folk-pop. And even if nobody has any real business signing finely wrought depictions of British middle-class repression in yarling post-grunge bellows, at least David Cook got a big chorus to belt out. The real test is going to be whether these contestants will be able to repeat the trick, carving out spaces for themselves in unfamiliar territory week after week. In the meantime, I'm really hoping I hallucinated that Seacrest announcement that they're doing another Lennon/McCartney show next week. I get it, OK?

comments

The guy who wrote thisis a complete jackass. Fuck U!!!!

Posted by: The Beatles Rock at March 13, 2008 3:13 PM

nice post, but im pretty sure most status readers would prefer to read about the wire. id pay 5 bucks to watch that guy punch marlo in the face.

Posted by: omar at March 13, 2008 3:16 PM

I thought about doing a Wire post, but I couldn't see any way to make it about music. Turns out I'll have an easier time with this Spitzer thing, surprisingly enough.

And anyway, I don't have too much to say about the Wire finale beyond that I was totally satisfied. They managed to send off all the surviving major characters without dooming too many of them or making any of the happy endings look fake or contrived. Moreover, they managed not to fuck up my favorite show. That's a real achievement.

Posted by: Tom Breihan at March 13, 2008 3:52 PM

Hated to see David H go, thought Kristy should have been the one voted off.

Do you think the revelation of David H's past was a factor?

Also I read that David A could have "took a Dive" or messed up on purpose from this site.
http://idol-mania.com/american-idol-fan/2008/03/11/david-arculeta-we-can-work-it-out-conspiracy-took-the-dive/

Your thoughts?

Posted by: Idol Fan at March 13, 2008 4:07 PM

"Most important band ever or not, does anyone ever listen to the Beatles for the vocals? At least in the context of today's scenery-chewing robo-virtuosos, were Lennon and McCartney even good singers? Or, more to the point, were their songs conceived as showcases for vocal pyrotechnics?"

Yes, yes, and definitely no.

Posted by: Jayson Greene at March 13, 2008 4:09 PM

Oh, and why didn't anyone just do "Oh Darlin?" At least that's a faux-soul song that would actually lend itself to the sort of horrid oversinging the show trades in.

Posted by: Jayson Greene at March 13, 2008 4:12 PM

I am sick and tired of hearing about, reading about, and seeing shit about the goddamn Beatles. Live and let die. Or at least tone down the overwrought hyperboles. Jesus.

There. I said it.

P.S. I may not have been the biggest fan of David H., but my jaw literally dropped when Ryan read his name. I thought for sure that Kristy Lee was gone after her county fair performance of Eight Days A Week. Ugh.

Posted by: Tauwan at March 13, 2008 4:56 PM

I liked it a lot. Although covering The Beatles is a pretty hard task. Not only will you have critics picking at you, but hardcore fans as well. The only reason American Idol was allowed to use Beatles songs after six years of trying, is because they're getting ready to release the catalog onto iTunes. That's just my belief of course. But I must say, seeing David Hernandez go was ok. I wasn't against it. He had somewhat of a cocky attitude to him. Was it just me? Oh well. But have you noticed how American Idol pulls in so many people? It's no surprise why they're nominated for FAVORITE REALITY SHOW on Nickelodeons' Kids' Choice Awards. You can go vote for the show here http://www.nick.com/shows/specials/kca.

They have more categories to vote for, plus FREE downloads, a reaaaaaally cool widget (click on it repeatedly and see what happens), a neat innovative VIDEO MIXER featuring JACK BLACK, because he's hosting again you know. Oh yes. A second time around. I'm working with Nick to get the word out. So make sure you check out the show, it airs on MARCH 29th @ 8PM.

WHO DO YOU GUYS WANT TO SEE GETTING SLIMED?

(Paula maybe?)

Posted by: Jenny Carson at March 13, 2008 5:39 PM

Chikezie's turning into a monster. Soon he will be unstoppable. It's good. America needs an idol with a ridiculous name. Also the URL for the guy who wrote the first post is this page. I find that ridiculously amusing.

Posted by: Suckapunkin' at March 13, 2008 6:11 PM

Uh, you are wondering if Lennon and McCartney are good singers? Ever heard Lennon's throat-shredding voal on "Twist and Shout"? McCartney has some of the best pipes in the business--ever listened to "Maybe I'm Amazed"? Of course, not, I bet you are like, twelve. Or heard him scream on "I Saw Her Standing There" or "Helter Skelter"? But John and Paul are *rock* singers, not singers of hackneyed crap pop.

I personally am bored with those vocal gymnastics people do in order to emulate Celine, Mariah and Whitney. Snore.

Posted by: HappyBunny at March 13, 2008 6:26 PM

dood you should do a spitzer/wire post, my first thought upon hearing about spitzer was that scene with carcetti & the hooker & the mirror

Posted by: omar at March 13, 2008 7:41 PM

American Idol? what? good music? art? any kind of gold standard in anything at all? Simon Cowell? prime time mass media crap for the masses. watch on tauwan!

Posted by: Idolidiotry at March 13, 2008 7:49 PM

Are you on drugs, Tom? The Beatles were the "greatest show on Earth", and they are still the standard by which all other bands are measured.

Posted by: John at March 13, 2008 8:53 PM

So Briehan doesn't like the Beatles...

This just explains SOOOO much.

Posted by: DocZeus at March 13, 2008 11:11 PM

I bet Paul was envious of John for the first time in over 27 years after that horrific show.

Posted by: Beatles 4 Ever at March 13, 2008 11:43 PM

I think paul was envious of john in .. oh... 1957.

Posted by: craigesmure at March 13, 2008 11:59 PM

you are a cynical bastard. i'd pay good money for chikezie to punch YOU in the face. now THAT would be oh-so-much more entertaining and satisfying!

Posted by: anna at March 14, 2008 1:10 AM

you are a cynical bastard. i'd pay good money for chikezie to punch YOU in the face. now THAT would be oh-so-much more entertaining and satisfying!

Posted by: anna at March 14, 2008 1:11 AM

Let's hope some contestant does 'Yellow Submarine' next week.

Posted by: Wesley at March 14, 2008 1:46 AM

I'd pay $100 to have Chikezie punch you in the face, dude.

Posted by: Kat at March 14, 2008 8:00 AM

I mean because he was dead and didn't have to hear his songs being raped like that.

Posted by: Beatles 4 Ever at March 14, 2008 10:11 AM

At least in the context of today's scenery-chewing robo-virtuosos, were Lennon and McCartney even good singers?

In that context, no. They were good musicians, whose voices were part of a full musical package. Were they good singers? Sometimes. Were they good musicians? Sometimes. Were they a good band? Absolutely. Were they good songwriters? Oh my, yes. Funky melisma and controlled vibrato surely have their place but a great song is no more a voice than it is the music or even the lyrics - it's a package deal. So far as I can see the only people who seem to get that on American Idol are Brooke White and David Cook - although I'm pretty impressed with Chikeze on that score as of last week.

Posted by: CMJ at March 14, 2008 12:17 PM

How about I'll pay David Archuleta $5 to burn down your cockroach infested studio apartment, THEN punch you in the face. Asshole.

Posted by: Kara at March 14, 2008 2:10 PM

worse article ever..would not read again

The Beatles > your life

Posted by: eddie at March 14, 2008 3:27 PM

You kind of invalidate this entire post with your third sentence. Who can listen to a jackass who only likes seven Beatles songs?

Posted by: bornafter1970 at March 14, 2008 3:55 PM

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I hate Beatles fans.

Posted by: carson at March 14, 2008 5:21 PM

I saw all the comments about how bad David A's performance was but didn't actually see it till later. Other than forgetting the lyrics a little, he wasn't bad. He was on key & actually gave some strong delivery. I think the judges are covering themslves for all the early gushing- It wasn't a "mess", just not outstanding. He may be a strong mimic developing his style at this point, but he is capable of so much and obviously feels the music.That was honest emotion when he sang "Imagine". Don't tear down a performer that may give us a lot in the future.

Posted by: joeee at March 14, 2008 7:10 PM

Can't trust anyone who knows so little about the Beatles and so much about American Idol.

Posted by: Jeff at March 15, 2008 1:15 AM

seriously, the wire is great.

Posted by: at March 15, 2008 3:42 AM

People tend to forget that the Beatles were not about being the greatest vocalists or musicians, although they performed both tasks well. They were about the songs. Those songs and the manner in which they were recorded changed music forever. Since the Beatles there may have been better volcalists and musicians, but nobody has written a body of work so large and so revolutionary in so short a time that the Beatles did between 1962 to 1969. They remain the yardstick by which all bands are measured.

Posted by: Anthony Bailey at March 15, 2008 9:38 AM

Whoever wrote this is a complete moron and does not deserve to write anything about music if he can't respect The Beatles. Fuckin dooshbag

Posted by: Kris at March 15, 2008 4:40 PM

"Tom Breihan" Who is he?? Cant be a music critic. You know what - I used to like the beatles more....kinda have leveled out a bit. But...what they accomplished in such a brief period of time is undeniable. No one....since has ever writen so much "good" stuff - since the Beatles....so much for the abovr critic....near any musician, songrwriter or singer, be it pop, jazz or classical - no matter how big or good they are....almost all aknowledge just how good and accomplished the Beatles were. One can say they are no "my style" or my taste" but one would have to be a complete nitwit...to say they were limited....or so so..........

Posted by: jim at March 15, 2008 6:25 PM

Who are you and why are you writing for the Village Voice? So you don't like the Beatles. Being a Beatlemaniac, I even have a few best friends that could care less for the tunes of Lennon, McCartney, and Harrison, and I can cope with that.

So what do you do to redeem yourself and your taste in music, Mr. Breihan? You spend your time not only watching American Idol, which is a capital crime in and of itself, you have a regular blog commenting on it as if anyone's opinion on the subject mattered whatsoever.

You have a right to defile the Beatles; so do the performers on American Idol. HOWEVER, you have NO RIGHT to complain that the Beatles are defiling, of all things, American Idol, the quintessential symbol of our current pop music wasteland.

"...She treated "Let It Be" like the Starbucks-pop manna it is"??? Like you, I was born WAAYY after the Beatles broke up, but even I have the sense not to characterize a universally recognized masterpiece as being derivative of the music being played at a coffee shop founded 30 years later. Get some fucking brains. Ever get the idea that practically everything you hear in a Starbucks, on a radio, ANYWHERE, wouldn't exist without the Beatles?

And to answer some of your other asinine inquiries: "Does anyone ever listen to the Beatles for the vocals?" Answer: Yes. Just a billion people or so. I personally spend hours finding their isolated vocal harmonies. I'll be happy to send you some.

"At least in the context of today's scenery-chewing robo-virtuosos, were Lennon and McCartney even good singers?"
Answer: No, I guess they wouldn't be considered good singers in that context, if being a soulless, fame-grabbing, show-off is considered good singing.

I pity you, sir. I hope your status one day attains the level of "hood"...or doesn't, or whatever the fuck that nonsense means, which I doubt you even know. Open your goddamn ears.

Posted by: Nathaniel at March 15, 2008 10:07 PM

Who are you and why are you writing for the Village Voice? So you don't like the Beatles. Being a Beatlemaniac, I even have a few best friends that could care less for the tunes of Lennon, McCartney, and Harrison, and I can cope with that.

So what do you do to redeem yourself and your taste in music, Mr. Breihan? You spend your time not only watching American Idol, which is a capital crime in and of itself, you have a regular blog commenting on it as if anyone's opinion on the subject mattered whatsoever.

You have a right to defile the Beatles; so do the performers on American Idol. HOWEVER, you have NO RIGHT to complain that the Beatles are defiling, of all things, American Idol, the quintessential symbol of our current pop music wasteland.

"...She treated "Let It Be" like the Starbucks-pop manna it is"??? Like you, I was born WAAYY after the Beatles broke up, but even I have the sense not to characterize a universally recognized masterpiece as being derivative of the music being played at a coffee shop founded 30 years later. Get some fucking brains. Ever get the idea that practically everything you hear in a Starbucks, on a radio, ANYWHERE, wouldn't exist without the Beatles?

And to answer some of your other asinine inquiries: "Does anyone ever listen to the Beatles for the vocals?" Answer: Yes. Just a billion people or so. I personally spend hours finding their isolated vocal harmonies. I'll be happy to send you some.

"At least in the context of today's scenery-chewing robo-virtuosos, were Lennon and McCartney even good singers?"
Answer: No, I guess they wouldn't be considered good singers in that context, if being a soulless, fame-grabbing, show-off is considered good singing.

I pity you, sir. I hope your status one day attains the level of "hood"...or doesn't, or whatever the fuck that nonsense means, which I doubt you even know. Open your goddamn ears.

Posted by: Nathaniel at March 15, 2008 10:09 PM

"And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I hate Beatles fans."

And we hate you, dumbass.

Posted by: Bob at March 16, 2008 2:01 AM

tom, what about all those 60s & 70s soul/r&b beatles covers? otis redding's "day tripper", donnie hathaway's "jealous guy"? plenty of room for vocal pyrotechnics on that stuff.....seriously, it's one thing being a contrarian, but quite another being a dumbass.

Posted by: nick at March 16, 2008 4:15 AM

man there are some mean dudes on here. tom, dont worry, what you're saying makes sense. I wonder if people even read past the first few lines?

Posted by: at March 16, 2008 4:28 AM

I just wanted to let all Idol fans know about a great new idol forum at: http://www.idolfanforum.com/

Posted by: American Idol Fan at March 16, 2008 3:31 PM

My TV quit what are the numbers and names after contestant #4?

Posted by: Kathy at March 18, 2008 11:04 PM

I agree with the author of the article; well said. It's about time that aging baby boomers stopped pushing them on the rest of us. Most of these sungs do not belong on AI because they were not meant to be belted out in a singing competition.

Posted by: Jon Burrows at March 19, 2008 11:09 AM

Well hating Beatles fans just proves some of these people are ignorant. And I have not heard any one latley who measures up to John Lennon's vocals. Music as you Mr.ignorant know it today would not exists without them.There is not really much else to say except your an ignorant ass.

P.S. Born way after 1970
P.S.I would pay Simon to punch David A. in the face

Posted by: otaku1 at March 31, 2008 6:22 PM

THE BEATLES R DA BOMB!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Noelle at April 4, 2008 10:42 AM

Whoever wrote this is sadly uneducated in music. Because if he was, he would know that The Beatles are the BEST BAND ON EARTH. And I also really hope the dude who wrote this article goes to New York on December 8th or 9th and says something bad about John Lennon's singing voice. I really, really do.

Posted by: beatlefan22 at June 2, 2008 6:27 PM

Whoever wrote this is sadly uneducated in music. Because if he was, he would know that The Beatles are the BEST BAND ON EARTH. And I also really hope the dude who wrote this article goes to New York on December 8th or 9th and says something bad about John Lennon's singing voice. I really, really do.

Posted by: beatlefan22 at June 2, 2008 6:27 PM

Whoever wrote this is sadly uneducated in music. Because if he was, he would know that The Beatles are the BEST BAND ON EARTH. And I also really hope the dude who wrote this article goes to New York on December 8th or 9th and says something bad about John Lennon's singing voice. I really, really do.

Posted by: beatlefan22 at June 2, 2008 6:27 PM

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