Assault Rifles and Pimp Hats at Our Hometown Kids' Christmas Parade

Categories: Featured

We went home for turkey, and our mom's dragged us to this wack Christmas parade in the place we grew up, a town where we once found post-student-stabbing blood on our public-high-school locker. (Swear to Jesus, which was coincidentally one of the most popular names there.) Nothing's changed, it appears: the balloon men sell inflated Spongebobs, stuffed Rudolphs, assault rifles, and pimps' hats! Christmas is for the children!

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